


Together

by Midlifecrisis



Series: The Journey [2]
Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-07-24 01:41:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 30,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20018161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midlifecrisis/pseuds/Midlifecrisis
Summary: This follows on from the first story, 'Alone' where Issac /Isak discovers his sexuality and Even in the same wonderful holiday. Probably not make much sense without reading that first!I also had a solo holiday to Oslo, but didn't meet Even! However, it did make me think that perhaps I needed to add a few episodes. Isak still has a lot to sort in his own life and he also has to learn how to be 'Together' and not 'Alone'. Each chapter will be quite short, I think.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Isak worries.

It had been no sacrifice for Isak to move to Oslo. He had nothing left for him in the UK - Oslo was where he had to be, where he belonged. He had thought about it long and hard over those four weeks that he was stuck alone in the UK and the conclusion was simple:

When Isaac became Isak, Even became his home.

But Isak was worried. Worried about many things.

What worried him, firstly, was the immensity of it all. Isak knew that although had HAD to be near a Even, and although Even made him happy... it wasn't Even's job to make him happy. He was worried that he wouldn't be able to make it in a new country. Maybe the issue wasn't where he was or who he was with, maybe the main problem was Isaac Walterson. He had messed it up in the UK. He had messed it up with Jess...there was a strong likelihood that he would mess it up in Oslo with Even. Maybe he wasn't Isak at all! He was plain old Isaac and a forty year old loser.

And what about that proposal? Even obviously thought he was worth something, but it worried him as well. It had totally taken him by surprise. They had really only been together for four weeks, and three of them had been in different countries! Isak had only just recovered from his divorce - that's what the holiday to Oslo had been all about. And he was only really beginning to understand his own sexuality. He knew he loved Even and that he had never felt this way before, and at forty years old he knew how lucky he was to have found someone who loved him and all his weirdness. 

As Isak mulled it over he let himself consider his doubts...what was actually the problem? 

Well, his first worry was the speed. Had things moved too quickly? 

There was a simple answer to that - Yes! People don't go on holiday, discover a well buried sexuality, meet the love of their life, change their name, move countries and get engaged all within a month. Well 'people' might not, but it's what Isak did. The first forty years of his life had been steady and predictable, the way that everyone was taught to behave. He acted with care and tried not to show off or stand out too much. He had made decisions, always careful of the feelings of others. And it had all been an unmitigated disaster of a cluster fuck. 

So...as he sat in his new flat in Oslo, next to his gorgeously hot, insanely sexy and achingly kind fiancé, he decided that he might as well give spontaneous a go. And 'holy fuck a doodle do', Even made him so happy he sometimes forgot to breath. 

And the sex...well, that just proved how right everything was. Isak thought that maybe he wasn't so much gay as simply 'Evensexual'. Everything about Even turned him on: from being a caring, doting father to Isak junior, to his gorgeous face: from his fascinating conversation and love of art, to his talent in giving blow jobs that made Isak float above his own body in rapture. He was the full package and Isak would be a moron to let him go!

And when he thinks of Even, standing in front of him, totally naked asking Isak to marry him, that's where his next worry begins!

Isak had at first been worried that the proposal was too spontaneous - a sign that Even was perhaps becoming ill, manic. However, they had talked about it and Even had reassured Isak that his therapist had agreed that spontaneity was not always wrong - and in this case was so, so right. So now whenever he thinks about Even - eyes wide with enthusiasm, ring box held open in his long fingers, mouth clenched unsure of whether to smile or not, and his dick dangling between his legs - he can't keep the smile off of his face. What a big dork! It was so romantic and so wildly inappropriate that it was just perfect. 

No, there was nothing he should be worried about. His present situation was neither usual, nor planned, but it was his life, and he treasured it.

Isak wanted to spend the rest of his life with Even. 

He glanced down at his ring as it carefully curled round his left finger. It was a beautiful reminder that Even wanted Isak for the rest of his life as well. The Norwegian birch and English oak bands shone next to the silver metal in the evening light. The more he wore it, the more they were polished by his own skin's oils. How poignant! Isak didn't have enough savings to buy a ring for Even yet, but he hoped that Isak junior would come with him and help him like he had with Even...when he had enough money again. All his money had gone on the move to Oslo and he so much wanted to be able to pay for it by himself. His plan was to buy it from his first month's wages.

All he had to do was get himself a job.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honeymoon period of being 'together'. Isak learns some useful stuff.

The first few days, actually the first week, was like a luxurious extension of Isak's holiday. Being back in Norway, back in Oslo and back in Even's arms, was like a dream come true.

Even took time off from his usual shifts and prepared an orientation program for Isak: he set up online banking, got a Norwegian phone and downloaded 'Vipps' because nobody except tourists in Oslo used cash. Isak had actually been embarrassed at the look on the T-bane employee's face when he had to hand over paper money because the machines only took e-payments. Even trained Isak in cheaper shopping and how to avoid the most expensive places in Oslo, showing him the markets and smaller shops run by the immigrant population, excellent value for money! He gave him a crash course in public transport, teaching him that letting everyone else go first was NOT going to work in Oslo, where queueing was an idea rather than a reality.

Isak also took care of his own more intimate orientation program, this time about sex!

During these days Isak was woken every morning by Even stroking his eyebrows or rubbing his cheek, they would kiss lazily which always turned into something more fiery and passionate. The time they spent together, getting to know each other better now that Isak was in Oslo to stay had altered their love making. Isak found himself able to slow down, go deep, play the long game. At forty, he found himself as a novice again, and he decided to give his sexual education his full attention. Whenever he had needed to learn anything before, he had learned it from a book or from experts, so he applied the same principle to sex with Even. He bought a recommended book about gay sex and read it cover to cover. He subscribed to an online help forum and asked many pertinent questions that he would have been far too embarrassed to deal with face to face. Only when he was sure that he had a good idea of what he was talking about, did he discuss it with Even. This was not because he COULDN'T discuss it with his fiancé, but because he wanted them to be much more than just student and teacher. And he wanted to surprise him.

This had delighted Even no end, who himself discovered all kinds of new things. His particular favourite was Isak's insistence on foreplay. Their first time having sex together had involved a lot of caressing and Isak had remembered how much Even had enjoyed being touched. So he bought two different intimate massage oils and spent one very special afternoon rubbing the knots out of Even's back, calves and bum cheeks. He discovered a delightful birthmark the on Even's left shoulder that he had never noticed before. He then used the oils to give him a handjob so good that Even actually lost the power of speech and spoke in only whines and groans for a good ten minutes.

And Isak learned about his own likes. Isak liked male genitals. Actually Isak loved male genitals, specifically Even's (as he had only seen other ones in photos or films). He didn't know if this was common to gay men, as he had a total experience of NONE in that regard, but he couldn't get enough of Even's dick, balls and general 'groinal' area. 

He loved Even naked - fully nude was great, but bottom half only with his top covered as if he was going outside, was his favourite. He found it particularly erotic when Even's dick was poking out under his t-shirt, or jumper or his absolute favourite...his work suit. He loved the nest of curly hairs that snuggled into his groin, they held Even's smell, so that when Isak got anywhere near it, he felt his hind brain take over and his lust start to ferment. It must be the pheromones, he thought. He loved Even's dick when it was floppy and resting, laying beside him in bed. He loved his dick floating in the bath where he watched it bob around, which always made Even giggle. He also loved his dick hard, long and standing erect. He loved touching it, holding it, tasting it and being filled with it. God, he was SO gay!

And on top of that, Isak couldn't get enough of Even in everyday life. They held hands everywhere! 

In the morning they would hold hands from the bed to the shower and then back again. Isak would lace his fingers with Even to walk through to the kitchen, or to the laundry. Their fingers gently caressed on the table top as they ate breakfast or dinner with one hand. Walking down the street was never a solo adventure.

On one very special occasion, the morning that Even was returning to a normal work schedule, he gave Isak's wrist a gentle, but soapy caress as they washed the breakfast dishes together. It had switched on a flame in Isak that had resulted in them both rutting against each other in the kitchen. Each rubbing themselves against the others thigh, Isak's sucking on Even's neck, and Even biting the meat of Isak's shoulder so hard that he nearly drew blood. Then they came like teenagers in their pants and had to shower and change before they could actually start their day properly.

Isak loved it.

They were together.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Real life starts to kick in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've got this story mostly written, but I wanted to try spacing out my posting of the chapters...creating a bit of tension by making you all wait. It's what all my favourite writers seem to do. As it turns out I have no chill or patience and doubt that my story has any quality or tension anyway. So I'm just going to stick with my old pattern of posting too quickly and too often.
> 
> Enjoy!

And then, without any warning, very quickly, real life had kicked in. He knew that they both couldn't live off of Even's salary alone and, anyway, Isak needed to work if he was to be allowed to stay in Norway. No matter how much being engaged to Even meant to Isak, it meant very little to the Norwegian immigration department.

Isak had moved to Oslo to be with Even without securing himself a job. He couldn't wait, he knew he needed to be next to Even and that was all that mattered. He didn't regret it, but it had made him anxious. And then after just one week, he had had a significantly debilitating panic attack at the supermarket checkout. They had only picked up a few things, but the bill came to 800Kr, which Isak had converted in his head to £80. How much? His thoughts had started to spiral....how could Even afford this...he needed to earn...he was a sponger, living off of Even's good nature...Even would soon realise Isak wasn't worth the stress...

However, this panic attack had been very different from every other time...because Even has been with him. 

He made him sit on the floor behind the checkout and knelt right in front of him. He breathed with him through it. He held his face in his strong, capable hands, thumbing his cheeks and speaking to him softly until Isak could feel his heart slow and his brain start to calm. Just Even's voice and Even's face grounding him and bringing him back. The haze and panic slowly dissipated until Isak was breathing normally again. Even gently took him by the elbow and led him across the street to a coffee shop where he sat Isak down at a table and ordered an English breakfast tea (leave the tea bag in) and added milk and sugar. He sat opposite him and slid it over the table towards Isak. He pulled Isak's hand onto the table, interlaced their fingers and held on strongly.

"What's wrong, baby?" Even eventually asked.

Isak paused, how could he tell him? He had to tell him. "I'm sorry. It was just buying that stuff. I realised that everything is so expensive and I'm not earning and..."

Even cut him off instantly, "No! We won't do this. Isak I mean it. We share everything now. We have to, it's how we will survive anything that comes our way. It's OUR money and OUR flat so...no! I won't let you think like that. And anyway, didn't I tell you never to convert prices. It only freaks you out." And he spread out his hands, palms up, eyebrows raised.

He made eye contact, "Look at me Isak, only me. This is us. Together. See me. Together. Ok?"

Isak let Even hug him, he smiled and nodded into his neck. They kissed cheeks. 

He knew Even was right, at least his head knew, but the knot inside his stomach was still tightening. He was embarrassed by the panic attack and worried about the overall money. They couldn't really be a family yet, a family of two, until Isak was playing his part. He still felt like a sponger.

Back in the UK, the consulate had been happy enough that his qualifications as a doctor in pathology was a desired career for an immigrant. It sounded so respectable and worthy, even to his own ears. However, his actual experience in the lab was pretty useless, and the rather generic reference from his manager was at most vague, at worst, unhelpful. His first few application forms hadn't even gotten an acknowledgement, so he had had to really up his game. He got very creative in describing his previous experience and he hoped that soon he would at least get an interview. It made Isak realise just how unambitious and sedentary he'd been for so many years. That was something else that Even had changed in him. He knew now that he wanted more, that he could do more, achieve more, be better and make a difference. He wanted to do it for himself, but he also wanted to do it for them, together.

As he waited, not at all patently, for responses from labs and companies, he knew he needed to find something to do with his time.

One morning as Even was getting up to go to work, Isak rolled over towards him, sheets pooling round his hips. The sun was later coming up every morning as summer lengthened and autumn drew closer, but it was still bright.

"Even, what should I do today? I know Isak will be over later for his days with you..."

"With US." Even stated plainly

"With us," Isak smiled, "...although he still needs time with you alone." He cocked an eyebrow. "And, as I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me, I'd like to be useful...until I can at last actually earn some money...although I'll need to get an interview first." He added quietly.

"And is there something wrong with being my sex slave, making yourself pretty for me coming home?" Even wiggled his eyebrows.

"As much as I love having sex with you, and I do...I looooooove having sex with you. So much! It might not be a great career plan for the middle-aged man."

Even smiled a gentle smile at him, "Isak, you've been tidying the flat for us and putting the the laundry on every day. Shopping. Cooking dinner. I've even been given a foot rub twice and at least one, end of the day, stress relieving blowjob. Perhaps it's time to do something for yourself? Get out of the flat and see what happens."

"But I don't want to spend any money..."

"There is so much in Oslo that is free. Have a look online, see what comes up. That's what you did when you were here on holiday. Do anything you want...Be brave!"

Isak's snorted, "Last time I was brave I realised I was gay and then made out with a twenty something hottie in a gay bar and got felt up against your hotel front window."

Even frowned, "OK. I'd really rather you didn't do that." He paused, "I'm sure you can find something that will be a good use of your time. What about a swim? You looked pretty great that day I came to see you at Frogner pool." And then he kissed Isak with total commitment and enthusiasm and just enough tongue to remind him why Even was way better than any twenty something hottie. 

As if Isak would forget!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak ponders...

The online search for free things to do in Oslo had been extremely fruitful. Isak had discovered that a park just a few streets from the flat had an outside gym, the type of equipment that you could use to plan your own workout. He also found out that the pool at Sørenga had a lane area where you could swim laps.

And so he went for it with everything. He researched how do use the equipment for workouts, planned his sets and put it together into a developing four week plan. He hoped that within four weeks he would be a bit fitter and have a fun but challenging job.

Over the next few weeks, Isak followed a very healthy daily routine. As Even got ready for whatever shift he had, Isak put on his shorts and t-shirt, packed his little backpack with his swimming stuff, fresh clothes and a bottle of water and did a small warm up run round the park. He then stopped and followed his plan, doing muscle work like sit ups, squats and leg curls using the free equipment. Then he completed a longer run to the pool, and finished off with a swim. 

He loved the pool at Sørenga. The cool, salt water was invigorating and easy to swim through. He showered there, outside, which he realised that he loved. It left him tingling and with more energy than a swim inside. He allowed himself the luxury of taking the tram home. It didn't cost him any more as he had his weekly pass now anyway.

At first it had been just a few lengths at the pool, but he was now up to twenty lengths of pretty good quality front crawl and feeling stronger every day. He was also less out of breath with his run and was able to do the strengthening work for longer. He surprised himself with just how much he was enjoying it. Well being outside and the exercise part at least. 

Unfortunately, it didn't seem to be helping him become a part of Oslo and find his own friends! He had never been super popular in the UK, but he'd had work colleagues and uni friends who he could rely on when he needed a night out or a bit of social time. He had met Jess after all at uni. 

As he pondered this during his runs and swims, he concluded that everyone, all people, have an invisible bubble round them with apparently repellent powers. He supposed it was literally one's personal space. Sometimes you might let someone through your forcefield, but more often than not, without a specific reason like work or study, people just bounced off each other...repelling rather than absorbing. The two guys who also seemed to be regulars at the gym equipment left him alone to get on with his own workout. They smiled but never talked. As he watched the hundreds of people at Sørenga, he realised that even though he was in this crowd every day, he had not made contact with even one of these people. Even the half dozen or so people who swam laps at the same time as he did were still strangers, even though he knew their faces and most of their workout plans. He was physically at the park, physically at the pool, but no-one cared and no-one noticed. If he left, he would not be missed. The citizens of Oslo were notoriously difficult to make cold contact with. They were polite and helpful when asked, but didn't really engage in any conversation beyond that. Even talking about the weather hadn't worked, and that always did the job in the UK!

In the whole of Oslo, there was no-one, apart from Even, who had let Isak into their space. Well, perhaps Isak junior, but that was different. When Even wasn't there, Isak was always alone. And all of a sudden he felt tremendously lonely and unexplainably homesick. But homesick for where?

One evening as they lay together, tangled up on the sofa, Even turned to him, "All this exercise that you are doing is really starting to change your body shape. Your waist is more defined and you're putting on muscle. Is that what you were hoping for," he lazily dragged the nail of his forefinger across Isak's stomach, "because I'm not complaining!"

Isak giggled at the touch. "Actually, I am really enjoying the exercise. I feel better and healthier, although it's going to get harder - I can't see me swimming in the Oslofjord when I have to break the ice. But that's not really what it was about. I was hoping to make some friends, but it's not really happening. Even when I have a go at talking to them in my rather rubbish Norwegian, I get a short conversation, but no one seems to want to talk for longer."

"That's Norwegians for you!" Even shrugged.

Isak detangled himself and sat up abruptly, pointing at Even, "But YOU'RE Norwegian, and you spoke to me. Morton was Norwegian and he chatted as well."

"Isak!" Even exclaimed, "What do both of those people have in common?"

Isak shrugged, "ahdunno...what?"

Even laughed, "We both fancied you and wanted to get into your pants!"

Isak looked at him quizzically. "What are you actually saying? The only way I'll make a friend in Oslo is if I make myself available or come on to them? Flirt with them?"

"Well... It couldn't hurt!"

"Yes it could! I don't want anyone else except you. It seems a bit sneaky. And anyway...who would be interested in me? And we're engaged, if you'd forgotten." He wiggled his ring in Even's face.

"I'm not telling you to act on it, I'm just saying its a great way to break the ice. Be a bit flirty. People do it all the time. If you hadn't turned out to be gay, we still would have had a nice time together, I think we would have become friends, and it was your flirting that broke the barrier between us. Don't you think? And anyway...I totally trust you."

"I didn't flirt with you." Isak almost shouted, "I didn't even know I was gay when we first met!"

"Your brain might not have known it, baby, but your endocrine system certainly did. You flirted your ass of with me and I loved it!"

Well, until he had a job, Isak thought he might as well try. What did he have to lose?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The pool at Sørenga? Amazing!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even is lovely.

Isak applied for any vaguely suitable job that was going: any lab or anything medical that was looking for a degree level qualification, he was on it! However, he had been supremely unsuccessful so far and was preparing himself to tell Even that despite his desire to take his career more seriously, he was going to have to apply for a low skilled or no skilled position, just to earn some money. This gave him the extra worry of the Norwegian government refusing it as a good reason to let him settle, although he knew it wouldn't be a problem when they got married. Not the point!

He knew Even wouldn't be disappointed in him for not getting a high powered or challenging job, but he was very disappointed in himself. Some fresh start! 

He continued to fill his day with exercise and housework. The water at Sørenga was noticeably colder now, but he had discovered that it remained open all year, so perhaps he could toughen up...although he seriously doubted it.

Then he got an email.

He'd managed to secure an interview for a small private lab that was looking for a technician. They carried out bowel screening tests on over 50s for the state health service, his speciality! He was highly overqualified for it, and it wasn't the challenge he had been looking for, in fact it felt like a backwards step. But the desire to at least be busy again, as well as the simple and urgent need to be bringing in money, led him to accept it when they offered him the job immediately after his interview. 

Not that flattering really, as it turned out that he had been the only applicant.

\-----

"I've made you a lunch and put it in a new bag for you." Even beamed as he held out and handed over his little 'Avengers' lunch case with Chris Hemsworth as Thor on the front and Mjolnir on the back. "I know how much you love Thor, and if you think about it, it shows your loyalty to the culture of Norway!"

Isak smiled back, "...and an extremely hot Australian actor."

"Just a little eye candy to get you through your day." Even giggled. "I've made you two sweet brunost rolls (I can't believe you like that stuff), put in some tomatoes, a banana and a packet of your teabags from the UK."

"Even, that's the sweetest thing ever. I think that you are one of the kindest people that I have ever met!" And then he whispered gently in Norwegian, "I love you very much, kiss me again?"

"Ah, my favourite Norwegian phrase! One of the first things you ever learned. Anything for my super smart fiancé."

Even kissed Isak gently, lingering to let Isak feel the pride and love behind his lips. Then he gave him a robust hug.

"Ok. Play nice with the other kids and listen to the teacher." 

Isak smiled, and kissed his cheek. "Very funny, asshole. I'm a grown man, starting my first day in a new job, but I appreciate the sentiment."

"Oh, and remember my advice about flirting your way into friendships!"

Isak snorted a laugh gave Even a final quick kiss goodbye and headed off into his day, walking stoically to catch a train to a small lab in a business park in the outskirts of the city to begin his new job testing the faeces of the over fifties for over twenty different age related bowel conditions. He found that he had a small buzz in his stomach, it might not have been all that he was hoping for but for now he was excited now about his future.

\----

He needn't have bothered being excited. Isak hadn't had amazingly high expectations, but even from his low starting point, the job was awful. Literally and metaphorically shit. He was one of two technicians who did the same thing every day. The same procedure over and over again. Every day. The same procedure. Testing shit.

The other technician, Aksel, was a school leaver who had been trained in the basics and was overseen by a more qualified colleague - in this case...Isak. There was NO WAY that Isak was going to flirt with him! 

The lab itself was in a soulless industrial park with a shared security guard and there were little to no opportunities to make friends or get to know anyone except Aksel better. All communication was done electronically in this paperless workplace so all the people he communicated with were just email addresses or faces on a video call. They had one bench in a seating area outside, which Isak escaped to for every break and lunchtime alone as Aksel never ventured out of the break room and the latest game on his phone. The bench had a view of the car park of the workshop opposite and the back of a large warehouse. Although through the gap in the buildings he could just see the Holmenkollen ski jump. At least he got some fresh air, a bit of time without a roof over his head. 

The first week in the lab felt like a month, and the first month felt like a year. But Even still made him his lunch every day - and if he was already at work when Isak got up, it was sitting in the fridge waiting for him. God, he loved that man!

His life became routine: Every day Isak got the train to work and the same train home, Even had one week on early shifts, one on lates, interspersed with his days off. Isak junior stayed on Tuesday and Wednesday and every second weekend. He had to alter his fitness routine to a run three times during the working week (usually at the end of the day as he and Even were too cuddly in the mornings for him to ever want to leave the bed) and then his old park workout and swim on the weekend. And so much of it was good. He and Even were in love and learning to love and live together. Isak junior was mostly a delight, although as thirteen came calling he did begin to change a little, become a little more sullen and less communicative. Summer definitely became autumn and autumn began to slip inexorably towards winter. The temperature plummeted and the days became noticeably shorter and wetter. 

By the time December came, Isak was 'celebrating' two months in his job, daylight lasted roughly five hours and his fitness routine was reduced to a gym and swim at the Tøyen indoor pool now that he could afford the membership. He missed the outside, the open sky and the fresh air.

The Oslo winter had taken him by surprise. He had lived in cities in the UK all his life and although they were seasonal, it was nothing as extreme as the change that came over Oslo. He couldn't put his finger on it but something had altered. He felt hemmed in, stuck indoors as he went from flat to train to lab and back. Oslo had seemed to be a city you could breath in, but as winter moved on, the city people seemed to avoid the outdoors because the weather was so unpleasant. He had thought that Oslo would be snow-covered and picturesque in the winter, but when the first snows came they quickly turned into a grey icy slop that refroze. City snow was not pretty. Still, at least unlike the UK, Norway was prepared to deal with snow and freezing temperatures. Everything kept running smoothly, no 'snow days' or train cancellations for 'ice on the line'. 

Isak still didn't regret moving to Oslo. How could he regret being with Even? But the niggling doubt came back to him in those dark winter days, or perhaps it had always been there and it simply floated back to the surface. He still didn't feel like he had truly found himself. He knew that he was earning enough money now to go and buy Even's engagement ring, and perhaps they should really start talking about the wedding, and actually getting married. But it didn't feel right...not yet. Isak didn't feel right. He didn't want to marry Even until he felt like Even was getting a fair deal. At the moment, Isak would have been far the better off party in any union. Even was so amazing: hard working and kind. Always thinking of Isak whilst looking after Isak junior and giving his all, every day, to a job he loved. He looked like a sex god and made Isak come so hard that sometimes he forgot his own name. Isak couldn't marry Even, until he felt like Even was getting as good a deal in return. 

The only problem was that he didn't really know what the problem WAS so he didn't actually know what to do to fix it!

One especially dull Monday morning at work, Isak was just beginning to plod his way through the day's samples when the electricity cut out. Just like that. One minute a bright electric strip lit lab, the next moment total darkness. 

Aksel turned to him in the dark, "What happens now?" As the senior figure Isak was supposed to know what to do. 

"Erm, I suppose I'll have to use my own phone to call André, I don't have a number for him, we always use the computer, but I think I remember him telling me there was a list of numbers written on actual paper somewhere for a situation like this. Give me a minute. Stay where you are in case you knock anything over."

Isak switched his phone torch on and moved carefully through to the office area. He found the phone list almost immediately as it was the only bit of paper in the whole place. He looked for André's landline number and gave him a call.

"Well", he informed, Aksel. "It turns out that the electricity has been turned off by the supplier, due to an 'issue' with the payment of bills. We have the rest of the day off, and probably the rest of the week as well! You're free to go and André will contact us regarding when the place will open again."

Aksel didn't need to be told twice. By the time Isak felt his way to the break room, gotten his lunch from the fridge and picked up his backpack, Aksel was gone - without even a goodbye. Isak quietly locked up and stood outside the main door. It was only 10:00. It was an almost cloudless day which meant it was at least a little brighter as the sun skimmed along the horizon. Even was at work until 22:00, so there was no point rushing home for some surprise sex, which was unfortunate. Isak was with them over the next couple of days so he always felt a bit restricted in how intimate they could be with a teenager in the house. 

As he walked towards the train station, he could see the floodlights of Holmenkollen sparkle brightly amongst the dark trees of the hills beyond. His curiosity was piqued. And just like that Isak decided today he was going to be spontaneous. He got on the train from the other platform, heading in the opposite direction to his usual journey, away from the city, and towards the ski slope. He wasn't sure why but it was as good a plan as any!

The ski slope was up a very steep hill, good for the calf muscles, he supposed. Here the ground was covered in several meters of snow - although like everywhere in Norway, access was no problem. The ski jump itself was still being given its final preparations for the jump season, so he decided to wander around inside. There was a ski museum and information on the history of the jump on this hillside. Isak enjoyed the museum, but as he exited (through the gift shop...how else he thought cynically) he saw a group of people gathering outside with unusual shaped skinny looking skis. What are they doing, he thought? He decided to continue being spontaneous and followed them to investigate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want that lunchbag.  
> Sweet brunost rolls...yum!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe Isak will find an outdoor hobby.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned by 3STB in the comments - Isak can stay in Oslo as a member of an EU country, and Brexit (*sigh) doesn't seem to be affecting that yet. But for my story, I needed him to be a bit worried, so I suppose it's more internal fear than external. Norway is VERY welcoming.

Isak looked at the group. What were they doing? There was maybe as many as a dozen people, and they seemed to range in age from early twenties to as old as seventy. They were dressed for some kind of outside activity in the snow. They had skis beside them. Unusually, for Oslo, one of the men came over and stood beside him ready to make conversation. He had a soft wrinkled face hidden in a cosy snowsuit and hat combo. Isak estimated his age at late fifties. Well at least his spontaneous approach was paying off - he was about to have a conversation! 

"Are you here for the event?" He asked enthusiastically. Isak's Norwegian was just about good enough to the understand phrase, but he struggled to answer in return. He used the words Even had taught him,

"I'm sorry, I'm just learning Norwegian. Would it be ok to talk in English?"

The man nodded, just as enthusiastically, and repeated himself in English, "Are you here for the cross country skiing event?"

"Is that what you are doing? No, I'm just visiting due to an unexpected day off work. Do you do this a lot?"

The man then launched into the most evangelical sales pitch on anything that Isak had ever heard. And his one true love...cross country skiing! Even if Isak took Even's advice and tried to flirt with his man, he would have struggled to get a word in edgewise! This guy obviously really, really loved cross country and in winter came every day to practice and every Wednesday and Saturday to take part in a community participation event on snow. In the summer he still came every week, but it was on the concrete surface with wheeled skis, "Good fun" he said, "but not as exciting as on real snow!"

The group leader called for them all to get ready. The man turned to Isak, "It's a great sport you know, very welcoming, I've made lots of new friends. See you around." And with a wave of his wrist he was gone.

Isak watched thoughtfully as they headed off. He wandered back through to the main desk, he was still trying to be spontaneous although he wasn't sure how much courage he had left. He was trying to be brave, "I was wondering if you did lessons or had any beginners' groups for cross country skiing?"

"We actually have a group this afternoon at 13:00. How old is your child?"

"Oh no.." Isak stuttered "...its erm not for a child, it's...ah...um...for me. I'd like to learn."

The lady behind the desk smiled a small but not subtle smile, "Oh I see. It's quite unusual. Most Norwegians learn from a young age. We don't really have any adult beginner classes as such." Then she paused, "Give me a minute" and she disappeared off through a side door.

Isak was just starting to feel awkward, thinking about sneaking out quietly, when she returned with a man, probably in his early thirties. He looked every inch a Norwegian skier: slender but strong athletic looking body, tall, pale skin, hair and eyes and a bright white smile. There was also something about him that seemed vaguely familiar to Isak.

"Hi." He smiled, "I'm Sven. I believe you are looking to learn how to cross country ski?"

Isak just stared at the man. He didn't know what to say. He felt his anxiety levels creeping up. He realised that he must have reached his bravery quota for the day!

"I'm so sorry, erm...Sven, I didn't mean to waste your time. I can't really afford private lessons and...erm...I don't know. I'm new to Oslo. I'm engaged to a Norwegian you see. We met here on holiday. Well I was on holiday, he works in a hotel." Oh my god, he was rambling. Why was he telling this guy his life story? "My work closed suddenly today. I was at a loose end and that group going out just seemed kind of excited." And for some reason as this man kept looking at him, he just kept talking. "I miss outdoor exercise. I used to use a gym outside in our local park and then swim every day at the pool at Sørenga but I can't do that in the winter. That was of course in the summer, although a little in the autumn too." Isak stopped and took a breath.

Sven looked at him and smiled. Isak expected him to excuse himself and make a mad dash to get away from this raving idiot. But he pointed at Isak and said loudly, "I knew I recognised you from somewhere! I've seen you many times at Sørenga. Front crawl? Right?"

Isak blinked slowly, "I thought you looked familiar too. Yeah! That's right...You used to go with another guy? Really tall? Always swam breast stroke."

"Yeah. He was my boyfriend. Ex now! Still, he was a rather horrible person, so no worries there...although he had a great body!"

Isak laughed a little uncomfortably, but he could feel his anxiety fading. He was actually talking to a Norwegian! 

"You know we all still swim there at the weekends. It's too dark in the morning or evening but in the middle of the day on a Saturday or Sunday...there we are. You should join us!"

"How do you manage that? Don't you freeze to death?"

"Sometimes we swim in wetsuits, it's the only way, or we just do a quick dip and then go for a sauna afterwards - they tow one round and it floats in the water just beside the boardwalk. Proper coal burner and everything. It's a brilliant thing made from recycled materials. Very traditional. It's amazing!"

"Really?" Isak exclaimed excitedly, "that sounds brilliant, I really miss it...you know, being outside so much. And that sauna sounds a great idea. Yes, very Norwegian!"

"It totally is." He grinned. "Anyway!" Sven shook his head and pointed his thumb at his colleague, "Emma says you want to learn to cross country ski. I've got a class of ten to twelve year olds coming in half an hour. It's their first lesson and would be perfect for you. How do you fancy joining in at the back? I'll introduce you as my assistant and then no one will care. What do you think...erm...?"

Sven paused, waiting for Isak to fill the gap.

"...Isak." He supplied.

"Isak." Sven smiled. What do you think...Isak?"

"OK," Isak shrugged, "I'll give it a go."

"And afterwards we could go for a coffee if you like. I finish at 16:00. We can make arrangements for a swim and sauna at the weekend."

"Yeah, Thank you." Isak smiled. "Although I prefer tea." He laughed.

It felt like at last he was getting somewhere.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to continue with Isak's story but the boys did this instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to jannet for a bit of inspiration. I'm loving responding to comments - other responses still to come...
> 
> I'm away tomorrow, so you get two chapters today. I know, I'm pathetic.

"What's this Even?" Isak asked as Even handed him a box roughly the size of a brick wrapped in shiny black paper with a silver bow. Even had just arrived home, it was nearly 23:00, and he had been on a very busy late shift. 

"I've bought you a present....and before you protest about cost, they weren't very expensive and I think you'll appreciate them. You're going to enjoy using them."

"I can't believe you got me something. Are you not exhausted after today?" 

But Even was smiling excitedly, shuffling from one foot to the other. "Go on...open it."

Isak tore open the paper animatedly, making a show of not being careful, and opened the box...but then stopped and stilled, his eyes wide. His mouth fell open. He pulled out two bits of what looked like interlaced moulded black rubber, with little black spikes running back and forward along one side. They looked...industrial. And possible intimate.

He held one of them up, letting it dangle from his outstretched forefinger.

"Even is this..."

"What Isak?" Even grinned.

"...is this something...kinky?" Isak was speaking so quietly that the words were barely audible. "Because we haven't really talked about that. You know I love you and if there's something you want to do or need then I'll of course do it for you, I don't want you not to be satisfied, but I must admit, that although a little dominance can be fun, I'm not sure so much how I feel about pain. I mean that thing...erm...I mean your gift, it looks quite....serious. There are spikes!"

Even snorted so loudly he nearly hurt himself. He was bent double laughing so hard that he could hardly breathe. Isak just watched him. There were tears streaming down his face. It went on for some minutes.

"Oh my God, Isak. That is the best ever. I'm definitely using that in my wedding speech." He wiped his eyes, trying to catch his breath. "No, you dork, they're Scandinavian running crampons. You put them over your shoes and it means you can run safely on the streets or grass without slipping. It's so you can run outside even in the winter. I know how much you miss it. The little spikes grip into the ice." And then he started laughing uncontrollably again. 

"Fuck, Isak - the look on your face. That was priceless."

Isak's face burned bright red. He buried his face in his palms.

Even gently pulled his hands away and cupped his cheek. "Oh baby. Don't be embarrassed. I love that you said you would do anything for me. Don't worry. I don't have a pain kink - at least I don't think so." He wiggled his eyebrows. "Now, why don't you try your gift on, on the right part of your body...your feet...on the OUTSIDE of your running shoes." He snorted again.

Isak sat down and put them on. He tried to concentrate on calming down the heat on his face and he tightened the clips.

"Thank you, Even. They are actually a really thoughtful gift. It'll be good to go running outside again. I'm sorry I was such an idiot." He was still very embarrassed. 

That's ok baby." Even was still sniggering. "Now I'll go and make us both a hot chocolate, to try and help you calm down. Why don't you tell me all about your surprise day off work and this guy Sven that you texted me about."

Even moved around in the kitchen: opening, heating, mixing and stirring. He eventually handed Isak a mug of hot chocolate, with cream and chocolate flakes.

Isak smiled sappily.

"So did you flirt with him? Did it work? This guy Sven...I mean, he asked you out for a coffee." Even asked with a big smile on his face, taking a sip.

"No. In fact I just kept talking, just saying whatever came into my head and telling him the truth about whatever he asked. I told you - I don't flirt!"

"Oh Isak!" Even laughed. "But that IS how you flirt!"

"What do you mean?" Isak looked at him grumpily. Taking a big spoon of cream into his mouth.

"When you get nervous you do one of two things. You either disappear into your own head and go totally silent. On our first night together you kept zoning out for minutes at a time."

Isak nodded reluctantly, "I suppose so..."

"Orrrrr...you start talking. Total honesty. You tell the other person everything you are thinking, full truth. You just did it there with the kinky crampons!" Even let out a tiny snigger. "Don't you remember telling me you thought you were gay because you liked looking at my arse? We had only known each other a couple of hours. It made me realise how brilliant you were. I think that's when I fell in love with you for the first time. It's the flirtiest trick ever! It's totally adorable."

"I wasn't flirting!" Isak began, but then stopped and looked at Even. "What do you mean - fell in love for the first time?" Isak asked slowly and quietly.

"Oh Isak, I have fallen in love with you many times."

"Like when?" Isak cupped his hands round the mug. He knew he was digging for compliments, but to hear his amazing man confess love...he had no shame.

"Well. Watching you try to explain your feelings on opening that present for one thing." Even giggled again. 

Isak frowned at him. "Even!" He whined.

"OK, serious!" Even bit his lips to try and control his glee. He paused, became more solemn.

"Let me think...erm...When you and Isak junior had that big chat when we went to the forest. You were so genuinely invested in what he had to say that I felt my heart do a little flip." He reached over and put his cup down. 

"OK. And...?" Isak asked gently, trying to tease more lovely words from Even's mouth.

"When you were all embarrassed after making out with Morton in front of the whole hotel. You looked so guilty, like I was going to give you a telling off or something. Your face when I told you how pleased I was for you that you got some action was a picture. I'll never forget it. It made me realise that no one had ever really loved you the way that you deserved to be loved. No questions. No judgements. Just love." He paused, adding almost silently, "I can give you that." Even reached over, and took Isak's mug from him.

Isak swallowed thickly. The atmosphere has definitely changed. Become more charged. More loaded. More meaningful. More sincere.

He looked straight in Isak's eye, "And I think I fell most deeply in love with you when you asked me to fuck you for the first time. It was so intimate, so honest and real. And hot! You looked vulnerable but determined at the same time. God, I thought I could hear my heart throb as you looked at me. Do you remember it...our first time?"

"As if I could forget. But I must admit, it gets a little fuzzy in places. I think I maybe lost focus for a bit." Isak started to flush again.

"No wonder. I've never seen anyone come like you did that night, you were radiant. As I slid into you, you were so undone. Saying random obscenities and whispering my name over and over again." Even's eyes lost their blue sparkle and began to grow dark. "You came untouched and you didn't even know what that was. God I felt like you were made for me." He moved closer to his fiancé, so that the space between them had shrunk to almost nothing.

"I AM made for you." Isak leaned close and whispered directly into his ear. "It just took us a little longer than usual to find each other." 

And then he added, "Fuck me, Even."

And their communication no longer needed to use words.

\------

Isak lay panting and sweating, on his back, arms and legs spread out on the bed, trying to catch his breath. Even lay beside him, same layout but face down. The tips of their fingers just touching on the covers.

"Well that was unexpected! Not what I asked for at all!" Isak half smiled.

"I guess we're vers then." Even mumbled, face smooshed into the bedspread. 

Isak grinned. 

They both fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak eventually tells his story.

Isak just stared at his fiancé as he slept peacefully beside him. Watching Even sleep was one of his greatest pleasures. He usually squirmed under scrutiny so this gave Isak a chance to really observe.

His body was beautiful: long and lean, although with little love handles above his hip bones that Isak loved. A scar on his shoulder where he'd had a dodgy mole removed. A scattering of hairs round his pale nipples. Some grey pubes that matched Isak's own. His limbs were a delight, even in sleep seeming to be connected to his torso by elastic bands rather than joints, it made his sleeping positions graceful yet somewhat unusual, like a doll thrown down by its owner. 

His profile was beautiful too: pale freckled skin, cute, neat little nose, and deliciously pouty lips. The little lines round his eyes showing where his smile regularly reached all parts of his face. He had a crease across his cheek where his face had been squished against the pillow. 

His hair, dirty blond, poker straight, knotted and sticking up at the back (Isak's fault) and floppy over his forehead. 

He giggled remembering his mistake with the gift yesterday. Yet, he knew that whatever Even asked of him, he would likely do it, because Even would never ask something that Isak wouldn't want as well. He knew that now. Isak still struggled to believe sometimes that he was here, that this was his life. Six months with this kind, wonderful man. What a life!

And last night...

Isak had always let Even take the lead, as he was the more experienced lover. Isak felt too naïve to top, and he had so loved being taken care of by Even. His only experience of sex had been with women, and although satisfying - as in he had orgasms - the difference with Even was overwhelming. The only way he could process it was to compare it to food. You could eat protein pills and drink vitamin shakes and they would keep you alive. But wouldn't you rather have a hot and spicy curry; Or a delicious stew; Or a rich and creamy cheesecake; Or a freshly made espresso? He could go on...the point was, sex with Even was amazing.

As they had explored each other, although their love making didn't always involve actual penetration, whenever it did, Isak gladly took all that Even had to give.

But last night...

As they had become more and more aroused, kissing and touching, despite Isak's request for Even to fuck him, something had altered. Even had stopped, looked at him carefully and simply lain down on his back, making himself available. He had moved Isak's hands, shown him and helped him, but it had been a revelation to Isak. It wasn't totally new to him, but to watch Even under him, to be able to lead and control someone else's pleasure so intimately was an erotic delight. It had been awkward and a bit fumbling at times, angles definitely could be a bit tricky...but together it had been amazing. Isak had loved it.

He couldn't resist touching his sleeping lover. He gently brushed his thumb over Even's gorgeous cheekbones. Even's eyes slowly opened. He smacked his lips and sighed lazily. 

"Good morning stud." He giggled.

"Thank you." Isak giggled back. "Although it might take a bit more practice until I'm the master of topping."

"I think that can be arranged." Even answered slowly, his voice deep and pleased.

They cuddled for a long time, facing each other. Stealing kisses, stroking, touching and grounding themselves on the bits of each other that they could reach. It was one of Isak's favourite things. Suddenly, when Isak stroked his side, Even jerked away from Isak's touch and hissed between his teeth. When Isak looked he could see small, finger tip size bruises spread across the boniest part of Even's hip. Isak gasped.

"Oh Even. I think I've hurt you."

Even twisted his head to try and get a look. The little circles of reddish purple were shaped like where they would be on a hand print.

"Holy shit, Isak. You've marked me."

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I would never...I mean...I didn't mean to do that."

"I know Isak. It's ok. I'm not upset, just surprised - that's new for us! It's a sign of passion. I've left marks on you before." Even reassured him. "Honestly, it's fine. Actually, I think I quite like them," he grinned, "Every time I look at them I'll think of you and last night. I loved what we did."

Isak shimmied down and gently kissed the bruises. "You sure?" He mumbled from somewhere around Even's navel.

"I'm sure."

They cuddled and snuggled a little more.

Eventually Isak spoke, "You know, I never got a chance to tell you about my ski lesson. I think we got distracted!"

"We sure did...lots!" Even began to softly tickle Isak's ribs.

"Look, do you want to hear what happened or not?" Isak sniggered, struggling to catch his breath.

Even rolled off him, "OK Marit Bjørgen, tell me all about it."

"Who?"

She's a famous champion skier...Never mind. So what happened?"

Isak sat up and crossed his legs, clearly excited, "Well. Cross country skiers are obsessed. I mean I had no idea what a huge sport it is and how much there is to learn. I stood there, watching these kids just pick up everything Sven said. None of them were 'beginner' beginners like me. It took me so much longer! First of all, I couldn't do the bindings, then I struggled to balance on these wee skinny skis. And once he had gone over the basics and we started following the novice trail, I couldn't actually propel myself forward at all. He taught us the 'traditional method' but I just sort of kept sliding back and forward, like a comedy act. I looked like I was running on the spot. The kids were in fits of laughter."

"Oh baby, I'm so sorry."

"No. Don't be. I was laughing too, it was hilarious. I had to put on these special sticky skis that really wee kids use, which the class thought was even funnier."

His face shone in happiness. "I loved it Even. André is due to call today, and it's likely that the lab will be closed all week, so I'm going to finish the course. Sven is letting me do it for nothing."

Even stroked his cheek. "You seem really happy."

"I am. I really am. I'm not sure why I liked it so much, but I just did. Afterwards, some of the other group joined us for a drink. I wasn't alone with Sven!" He looked pointedly at Even. Even grinned back.

"All they talked about was skiing. Everything from which wax to use for which temperatures and type of snow, which bindings are best, makes of skis...it went on. And everyone had a different opinion. Sven said 'Ask six Norwegians about the best way to wax skis, and you’ll get seven different answers.' And it's true! If I had known this a few months ago, I could have made friends so much more quickly. Norwegians love to talk about skiing! Everyone had a story about when they were learning."

"That sounds so good. We've got Isak this weekend, so how about I ask him to bring his stuff and we take you skiing? We could go somewhere flat, like to Frøgner or something and you could practice. Isak's pretty good. Maybe the skating technique would be better for you, he prefers that one. Did you double pole, or alternate pole? You could use one of my sets of skis."

Isak looked stunned, "You know about skiing? You guys ski? You have more than one pair?"

"Of course we ski...we're Norwegian."

"Why did you never mention it?"

"You never asked."

"But you've not skied since I got here?"

"I didn't know if you'd want to!"

Isak burst out laughing. "This will be great. Can we go on Saturday as I've promised Sven I'll go swimming with him on Sunday? He's going to lend me a wetsuit. We're going to go to the sauna in the fjord. One of the floating ones?"

"Wearing another man's wetsuit. In a sauna with him? I don't know what I think about that!"

"Very funny."

They began to wrestle and tickle - Isak avoiding Even's tender spots - giggling and screeching, each stealing kisses until they were interrupted by André ringing to let Isak know that the lab wouldn't reopen for the rest of the week, so Isak was free.

They didn't get out of bed for another hour. It was a good morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love describing Even.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak makes more friends.

It was December and Isak was in a sauna floating on the ice of the Oslofjord. He had been freezing and now he was roasting.

\---

He had spent the rest of his unexpected week off learning to cross country ski and picking Even's brains about his potential visit to the sauna with Sven. By Sunday morning he was actually a bit of a mess.

It wasn't the skiing that was the problem. In fact, it had been brilliant. By the Wednesday the kids had stopped laughing at him and by the fifth lesson on the Friday, some were even asking for his help or advice. He had gone in early and practiced on his own at the centre's track every morning. The final trail that they did had been in the form of a treasure hunt and it had been fantastic fun, especially the tiny wee bit of downhill at the end, that Isak just about managed to control. 

However, the sauna with Sven was a different matter. He was, to put it mildly, terrified. What was the etiquette? Do you talk? Do you wear your swim suit? Do you have to go straight into the cold water? He was obviously nervous and starting to become a little anxious. 

Even had just laughed at his questions and suggested that he asked Sven. Isak junior told him that he was sure that he wouldn't have to do anything he was 'uncomfortable' with. This led Isak to think about all the things that he might have to do that would make him 'uncomfortable', there were so many that he started to get lost in his own head. 

On Sunday, as the time to leave approached, he felt his breathing get shallower, and he had to sit down on the couch. Isak junior was banging about in the kitchen, headphones in, listening to whatever he listened to at the moment. Isak had decided that he was going to text Sven to say he couldn't make it when Even sat down beside him.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah fine." Isak breezed.

"Isak?" Even said softly.

"OK, OK I'm freaking out a bit. I think this sauna thing is maybe a bit more than I'm ready for?"

"Isak," Even started stroking his curls, "You are amazing. You have moved to a new country, are learning a new language and have started a new job. AND you've discovered a new way to have sex." He whispered. "You've put yourself out there and found a new sport and with it a new friend. You can do anything you put your mind to."

Isak stared at him. "You think so?" Even pulled Isak's hair until Isak gave in and fell over and his head was resting in Even's lap. He stroked his temples with his thumbs.

"I know so! Yesterday, at the park, I wasn't expecting very much of your skiing, but you were really good. Isak even said so, and he's been a grumpy little shit lately. I wish I could do something about his attitude." He added.

Isak smiled up at his fiancé. "Don't worry about Isak, I'm sure that's normal thirteen year old behaviour."

"I know, but I never thought he would get like this, he was always so cheery. Anyway, at least he enjoyed the skiing. Your skiing is improving really quickly because of all the practice. I am honestly SO proud of you. SO proud."

"So you think I should go? To the sauna...with Sven"

"Yes, I think you should go. Although I personally think that breaking ice in order to swim is nuts, but apparently I'M the crazy one." 

Isak frowned at him. "OK, but don't call yourself crazy." 

Even leaned over and kissed him softly. "Sorry," he whispered.

Isak kissed him back and then stood up with purpose. He grabbed his bag and stuck his head into the the kitchen to say goodbye to Isak junior.

"Isak?" He said.

"Isak?" A little louder.

"Isak?!" He shouted, waving his hand in front of his eyes. Isak looked up.

"That's me away. I think you'll be gone when I get back so I'll see you on Tuesday night."

Isak mildly rolled his eyes, flapped his hand and turned back to doing with bread and cheese...whatever he had been doing. Isak senior turned to Even.

"I think he is definitely a teenager now."

Even sighed, "I know. I really should do something about it. Sorry."

"Nah. It could be worse." He giggled. "Ok, wish me luck." And he left.

\----

Isak's only experience of saunas had been the ones in the sports centre in the UK. Little funny smelling wooden rooms with an electric plate that someone chucked some swimming pool water on every now and then. It smelled of chlorine and everyone wore their swimming costumes, looking awkward. This was very different.

It looked like a homemade shed floating in the ice of the fjord. Inside it was put together with reclaimed materials and second hand equipment. Isak loved it! There were four people: Sven, Isak and two of Sven's friends, Arne and Jens, who Isak kind of recognised from swimming in the summer months. They had gone for a few lengths in the wetsuits, breaking the thin ice as they went. Then they had stripped the suits and gone into the sauna. The other three guys didn't bother with clothes, so Isak went along with this too. 

Sven explained that a sauna was a place for people to 'bond' and get to know each other, but that it was absolutely not sexual so he shouldn't feel uncomfortable. They spoke in mostly English, but Isak asked them to use Norwegian as well to help him improve his conversation. When they got too hot, they popped outside and dipped into the ice water and then rushed back inside. By the time they left, it was dark.

Jens suggested a beer at a bar he usually went to, which was on the way to the tram, so they all piled in, with their rucksacks full of damp towels and rolled up wetsuits. The bar staff let them dump them in a corner. Isak had downed a pint of water first, he didn't want to get caught out! He texted Even to let him know what they were doing, after a little while he got back a simple - 'Enjoy!' He sent back a sparkly heart. 

Isak looked around, noticing a theme of skulls and a colour pallet of mostly black and grey. "What kind of place is this?" He asked Jens.

"It's a bar and music venue that focuses on heavy rock music." Jens shouted at him, over the already quite loud music. "The venue is upstairs. It's really cool and very friendly."

"The WiFi password is Satan666!" Isak pointed out.

Jens smiled, "Pretty funny yeah!"

Due to the loud music, Isak found himself mostly in conversation with Jens, who was sitting next to him. He was an accountant at a big Norwegian architectural firm, but spent all his spare time either skiing, swimming or doing some other form of outdoor exercise like rock climbing, mountain biking and shooting. He had a girlfriend but it seemed to be pretty casual. Isak guessed Jens was roughly the same age as Sven and Arne (early thirties?) and was well built with a full sleeve of tattoos on both arms. He could see how this bar would be his kind of place. Their conversation petered out for a while as Jens saw some other people he knew at the next table. Arne turned round to speak to him.

They spoke in generalities for a while until Arne became more direct.

"So am I right in saying you work in a lab?"

"Yeah! I'm actually a pathology graduate, but there was no other work, so I kind of had to go back to basics. I really need to be earning. I don't want the government to send me back before Even and I get married."

"Why would they send you back?"

"For being an unemployed immigrant."

"But you're from the UK. With the right paperwork, you can stay in Norway as long as you like. It's part of their agreement."

"It is? How do you know that?" Isak frowned.

"I work for UiO. We have loads of research colleagues come over from the UK to work with us. I run one of the projects, so I have to deal with contracts and stuff."

"Oh..." Isak felt a bit stupid. "I took the job because I was panicking. I must admit, it's pretty terrible. I don't think they're even managing to pay their electricity bill. I've not missed it at all this week. When I moved here to be with Even, I was kind of hoping to take my career more seriously. Do something that I was interested in and that would be more challenging."

"Have you thought about research at UiO?"

"I did look at the pathology opportunities, but they were all linked to very hi-tech projects, using programming and computers to personalise medication. That didn't seem very interesting to me. And I have no experience anyway."

"Would you be interested in a sideways step?"

"What do you mean?"

"I can't really explain here, but would you like to come and visit me on campus? I could explain to you properly. Here, this is my card, but I'll write my personal mobile number on the back. Give me a call and we'll arrange something for this week."

Isak tucked it into his wallet.

After a couple of beers he decided to head home to Even. The other three were probably going to stay for the live music, but it wasn't really to Isak's taste, and anyway, he missed Even. He wandered through the Christmas market for a bit. It was all rather cliche, gingerbread style stalls with twinkly lights and cheesy Christmas music playing, but Isak thought how much Even would probably love this, and decided that they should visit it together later this week.

As he unlocked the front door, he was excited to tell Even about his day and about the potential visit to UiO with Arne. However, the lights were out, and it was clear that Even was already in bed. Isak stuck his head round the door but Even was fast asleep. It was only 21:00, so Isak made himself a cup of tea and drank it standing up in the kitchen whilst scrolling through his phone. He peed, brushed his teeth and striped down to his briefs before climbing into bed behind Even. He draped his arms over Even's waist and settled his nose into the dip at the back of his neck.

"Good day, baby?" Even asked sleepily.

"Yeah. It was great. But I missed you." He pouted then paused. "I might have another job opportunity."

"S'great. Tell me tomorrow?"

" Mmm Mmm, OK." He pulled Even tighter and gently let himself drift off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've tried to tighten up on my research. Let me know of any other bloopers.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even struggles

It was clear the next morning that all was not right with Even. He was usually awake first, making Isak a cup of tea, and even bringing it into the bedroom if he wasn't up yet. But this morning he had rolled over and fallen asleep again. Isak went to the kitchen to check the calendar. Even was on a day off, but he was never one for sleeping in. Something felt wrong, although he wasn't sure what.

He wasn't sure what to do. Could this be a problem with his mental health or was Isak just over reacting? He knew that Even's bipolar condition could never be 'cured', but because Even managed it so well, he often didn't include it in his thinking. Was that a mistake? He knew how Even hated to be defined by it. His thoughts went round and round in his head. Do I wake him up? Speak to him? Ask questions? One thing he did know that he could definitely do was take the day off work. They'd been shut for a week already, so one more day would make no difference. He'd phone in sick and then that way at least he and Even would have the day together. Together they could deal with whatever this was...and if it was nothing, then he'd have the day with Even which was always preferable anyway.

He wandered back through to the bedroom with a glass of apple juice (Even hated orange) and sat down on the bed next to his fiancé. He noticed that he wasn't actually sleeping anymore.

"Morning baby. I thought it was my turn to bring you breakfast in bed. Well, juice anyway!"

"Thanks." Even acknowledged, but he didn't roll to face Isak or reach out to take the glass. Isak sat it on the bedside table.

They sat in silence. Isak thought back on the last few months, trying to think of any issues or patterns that might explain how Even was feeling now. His work seemed to be going well. He hadn't mentioned any issues with Isak junior beyond his teenage moods. The only real difference in his life was Isak, Isak moving to Norway and moving in with him. Isak and all his dramas. Had Isak done this to him? Was he to blame? Even had spent the last few months making sure that Isak was as comfortable as possible, soothing his anxiety and helping him face the challenges of moving country, was it all too much? God, Isak, he thought, you've been so selfish. No wonder he's run out of time to care for himself. Isak felt awful. He reached out and stroked Even's hair, just on the crown of his head.

Even leaned into this touch, sighed and rolled over to face Isak. To Isak's eyes it seemed to take more effort than it should. Even didn't look directly at his fiancé, but at his chest.

"I'm not feeling so good."

"OK." He paused. "Do you know why?"

He sighed again, it was rattling and deep, coming from his core. "I think...probably...bit depressed."

Isak's first instinct was to ask if it was his fault, but he realised that this would be inordinately selfish, forcing Even to comfort Isak again, which was not what he needed.

"Can I help?"

"Could you hold me?"

That Isak could do. Isak shuffled under Even until his head was resting on Isak's belly. They tenderly hugged, just gently sharing the space on their bed.

"I don't usually liked people around, but this is good."

Isak concentrated on transferring as much positivity and love over to Even as possible. He didn't know if this was a real thing, but by God he was going to try.

They stayed this was for a long time, Isak desperately trying to let Even know that he was there for him, just through the the touches of his body.

"Do you want to tell me anything?"

"No." Even managed. "Not yet."

"OK," Isak answered quietly. Then honestly, "Erm, Even, I'm not sure what to do."

"Time. Quiet. Sleep." It seemed to take a gargantuan effort just to say those three words.

Isak nodded. "OK." He paused. "I'll let you be for a bit, but...could you drink the juice first?" 

Even sat up slowly, drank half of the apple juice and flopped back down. Isak kissed him lightly on his lips, he tasted of apple, and quietly left the room. He sat on the sofa staring at his hands. He felt so helpless. He couldn't think of what to do? Although they had talked about Even's mental health, Isak had never asked Even about a plan of action or what he should do if something happened. It went round and round in his head. He was useless, he had no idea what to do. Useless. He couldn't believe that he had been so blasé about something so important. Even always came across as so together, and so confident.

Well, Even had asked for a quiet day so he would give him that and then tackle it again later. Isak was determined to show Even that this was something they could now face together. He just wasn't sure how!

By the time evening came, Even was still in bed, so Isak gently knocked on the door and carefully entered.

"Hi baby. I wondered if you wanted something to eat. I wanted to make you a traditional Norwegian soup, I thought it might be comforting, but they all seemed a bit heavy and creamy...and fishy! And that's probably not what you want just now. So I gave Sonja and Isak a call, I hope you don't mind, and they said you liked simple chicken soup when you were feeling down so I nipped out and got the ingredients for it and made it. I made the stock from scratch, ...but that doesn't matter. I couldn't find any broccoli so I just substituted some kale, it's full of goodness, I think actually it's a super food! Anyway I chopped everything really small so you can just drink it from a mug. I was going to liquidise it, but that often makes it look a funny colour. It shouldn't be too hot. Would you like some? It's absolutely fine if you don't. It was just incase. Sonja and Isak send their love. Erm, but..." He stopped speaking.

Even was looking at him. It wasn't exactly a smile, but it was recognisable as a pleased face.

"What?"

"Thank you." He continued to look at Isak.

"Why are you looking at me...like that?"

"You and all your words. I can see you trying for me. I don't mind you trying. With my parents and then Sonja it always felt too...too. I don't know, just too much."

Isak smiled back at him, left and returned with two mugs and sat beside him, quietly keeping him company as they sipped their soup. No one spoke. Isak left it to Even to decide what he wanted. He had now read lots about loving someone with Even's condition, and the best advice had been to avoid pressuring them.

Even only drank a little of his mug of soup, then set it on the table and shimmied back under the covers.

"Lie with me, Isak?" He sighed.

Isak shimmied down too, Even's head resting on his shoulder. More silence, but it was ok. They were together, it would be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I find Even's Bipolar Condition very difficult to write as I have no experience, yet Even would not be Even without it. I also feel very strongly that it should not be used as an lazy plot twist. The next few chapter are therefore about the boys growing together.


	11. Chapter 11

Even stayed in bed the whole of Monday, which stretched into Tuesday and Wednesday. Three full days. When he saw how Even looked on Monday night, Isak had immediately taken the rest of the week off, citing family issues, and did his best to look after Even without smothering him. He just gently kept bringing him water or juice, maybe some more of the chicken soup. He prepared tasty bites that he knew Even liked: slices of fresh orange (no skin), cubes of mango and nectarine. He didn't always eat them, but sometimes did. Isak hoped it would help freshen up his mouth.

He checked with Sonja about making him wash or even brush his teeth. She advised against it as it could feel like pressure, so he just subtly opened the window a little to let in fresh air.

They slept side by side every night. Isak wasn't sure that this was what Even wanted, but whenever he tried to say something and leave, Even just held on to the nearest bit of Isak that he could reach and made him stay. So, of course, Isak stayed.

Isak used the time during the day to make an appointment with Arne for the next week. He also sent a resignation email to the lab, because to be honest, he was never going back. And then he did some reading about all the different research projects at UiO, and did some background work on them.

On the Thursday morning, when Isak woke up, Even was already awake and looking at him. 

"I wish this flat had a bath. I would like to take a bath."

"Would a shower do?" Isak smiled gently. "Good morning by the way."

Even half smiled, "Would you come and help me?" It was the most he had said since Monday.

The two men shuffled to the bathroom and Even sat on the toilet seat as Isak got everything ready. He found the softest, biggest towel they had and lined up Even's favourite potions: including his tea tree shampoo and mint body wash. He made sure the shower was hot enough, then got them both undressed, Even raising his arms and legs as instructed. Isak chucked the rather pungent clothes into the laundry basket and guided Even under the water. Even's eyes fluttered closed as Isak gently ran his fingers through Even's luscious hair, and then proceeded to wash every bit of Even that he could reach: sponging, soaping and rinsing. There was nothing overtly sexual about their touching, but it was intimate and Isak could feel himself settling into his fiancé again. He hadn't realised how much he had missed contact with him. He hoped it was having the same effect on Even.

Isak heard Even breath out a gentle sigh as he rinsed the shampoo out of his hair and smiled to himself.

He washed himself quickly so that Even wouldn't get cold. Even just stood and watched. At one point Even simply reached out with his forefinger and touched Isak's chest, just where his heart would be. He drew a little cartoon love heart with tip of his finger. He smiled. Isak nodded at him.

"Me too." He said.

Once they were both dry, hair fluffy and unstyled, Even sat on the toilet seat again as Isak changed the bedding. Then they slipped back under the clean smelling covers. Isak was half sitting and Even was draped across his chest, breathing gently.

They sat this way for some time. Isak was about to ask Even if he would like something to eat when Even spoke. It was a good position for talking - they were close, touching and intimate without it being intimidating.

"Erm. Isak. Can I say some things without you getting upset? It's really important. I haven't been communicating and I need to."

"Only, if you're up to it."

"Yeah. I'm feeling much better. My head feels clearer. Could I say a few things?" 

Isak nodded and hummed, bracing himself for something difficult.

"I had been aware of this coming on for a few days. The world starts to lose its colour and my energy drains. I didn't tell you because you were so excited about the skiing and your sauna date. I should have spoken to you."

Isak hummed again in acknowledgement. Afraid how his voice would sound if he spoke. Even was being so strong and Isak didn't want to do anything that got in the way of him getting better.

"I mean I've been doing everything I am meant to do. I'm still taking my meds and going to my appointments."

There was another silence. Isak cleared his throat sharply.

"Even, is it something to do with me?"

Even paused, "Yes, I think so."

Isak swallowed, determined not to show hurt.

"I think it is just all the changes and upheaval. I have spent a lot of time talking about you and taking care of you, so I don't think I was careful enough with my own mental health."

Isak felt wretched. "I'm so sorry, Even. I've been really selfish. It's all been about me and my anxieties."

"I don't think it works like that, baby and that's not what I mean. I love having you here and helping you. I wouldn't change falling in love with you for anything. I think it was just more than I was expecting. It used a lot of energy...all the changes. Something very similar happened just after Isak was born. I should have been more prepared really. This condition can be a bitch sometimes, just when you think you've got a handle on it... Well, you know."

"So, you want to stay together?" Isak asked timidly.

Even sat up and looked Isak straight in the eye, "Isak, finding you was the luckiest move ever. You are an amazing man and I love you deeply. Fuck, I don't know what I would do now without you."

He paused, and Isak could see a flicker of something unspoken in his eyes.

And can I say something else?"

Isak nodded.

"I've been really worried as to why you haven't bought me my ring yet. I've actually been obsessing over it. I didn't want to mention it because I didn't want to pressure you." He swallowed with difficulty. "I know I joked about Sven and you flirting, but you are so newly out and I'm really your first relationship as a gay man. I'm so worried that you will find someone better. Sven sounds so fit and fun. I think he's a better catch than me? You're so radiant and alive. I think.. I think. Well, I wouldn't be surprised if you left me."

And with that, a big hot tear ran down his cheek.

Isak was sure that he heard his own heart break.

He pulled Even tightly into his arms. "Oh Even. I'm so sorry. Oh my god. Fuck. I'm such an idiot. That's not it at all. Sven and the other guys are just friends."

Even sniffed, "I do know that - really. But don't you think you could find someone better than me? I'm...I mean...I come with such baggage. And I'm broken." And he started really crying...hard. Big noisy sobs that cut Isak's very soul.

He wiped at Even's hot, wet cheeks with his thumb. "You're not broken, and you are exactly what I want."

God, how did he fix this? This was all his fault. He took in a large breath. 

"I didn't buy the ring because, well because I was an idiot. I thought that I could get chucked out of the country for not working, although I now know that I can't. I didn't check properly. I was trying to prove myself worthy of you by getting a good job. I am so ashamed by my job at the lab, that I didn't feel that I deserved you. I'm still doing what I did in the UK, in fact it's not even as good!"

Even looked at him, his eyebrows pulled together. "You don't feel good enough for me?"

Isak nodded, "And then I just kept putting it off. I'm so sorry." He finished, so quietly. "I love you so much. I can't believe that I've been so selfish and let this happen to you." Isak whispered.

And with that Isak couldn't hold his tears back either. Both men lay together and wept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pathetic ask, but is anyone still reading? It's gone quiet and apparently that makes me doubt. I've got a quick ending or a more detialed one.


	12. Chapter 12

"I think this is what the kids call 'ugly crying'!" Even snorted after some time.

They both had puffy eyes and red cheeks. They had snottery faces and needed to blow their noses. Isak found a hand towel that they both used to clean themselves up a bit.

Isak looked at Even, "What do we do now?"

"I'm not sure."

Silence.

"I have a suggestion..."

"OK...?" Even sounded doubtful.

"It's maybe a bit 'out there' but it feels right."

"OK...?" Even sounded even more doubtful.

"We should get married."

"Okaaaaay...?"

"Not a big stressful event, but let's go and get the paperwork sorted and just get married. Once you're feeling better and once I'm more sorted career wise we can do a big celebration if we want, but let's just get married!"

"You think?"

"Yeah. I mean why not? We love each other. We live together. We sleep together. We've even had sex a few times! It's all that left. And I agree, my reasons for putting it off are poor reasons. I really want the world to know that you are my husband. I think it will stop both of us feeling so insecure...and I really, really want to!"

Even smiled. "Isak, that sounds great. However, I'm not sure I could organise that at the moment."

"We can talk about it together, but I'll do all the admin. We'll just go to the first place that has a free space - church or civic. I don't care. I'll speak to Isak and arrange for him to come ring shopping with me. We can wear what we want, invite who we like and celebrate however we want. What do you think?"

"I think yes, but keep it small? Then it would be perfect." He reached over and shook Isak's hand. "Deal!"

Isak smiled and returned the hand shake, but pulled Even in for a soft kiss. 

"I'm also going to quit working at the lab, well I actually already have. I'm kidding myself that it's what I want to do. I'd rather stock shelves in a supermarket! I've got something I'm going to follow up on next week, so we'll see. And I'll call Isak and make arrangements for that shopping trip!"

Then Isak looked at Even. "I know this is a question I'm not meant to ask, but how are you feeling?"

Even sighed, "I'll try to answer." He took Isak's hand. "I still feel exhausted and struggling, and I still think we've got a lot to talk about. Isak, this is nowhere near sorted. I'll need a few more days of rest. But I can feel a brightness on the horizon...Hopeful. Relieved."

"That's good enough for now. And yes there's more to talk about, but not now. You're not ready for that yet. Do you want me to leave you to sleep?"

"No way! You're staying here where you belong."

\----

Ring shopping with Isak junior had not been at all what Isak had been expecting. When Even described their trip six months previously, it had sounded joyous, with Isak junior full of enthusiasm and ideas. This trip was very different. Now the teenager could only be described as 'grumpy' or even 'truculent'. He didn't like any of the rings that Isak suggested, but offered no ideas of his own. He hardly spoke as they walked around, trying to avoid the busyness of the Christmas market, Isak had no idea what to do. They were achieving nothing, not even a pleasant day together. Maybe Isak had changed his mind about being happy for them? He had very little experience parenting thirteen year old boys. So he decided to try bribery.

"Would you like to take a break and go for an ice-cream? My shout? There's a really nice cafe near where I swim."

Isak rolled his eyes. "Ice-cream is for little kids."

Isak swallowed down a snarky answer about how he WAS a kid and wasn't his name was meant to mean 'laughter' anyway, and instead politely asked him what he would rather do - hoping it didn't involve beer or gløgg.

"I like espresso." He stated simply.

Isak breathed a sigh, he could do that. "Should we go to a KB?"

Isak rolled his eyes again. God, his eyes were going to get stuck looking at the back of his head if he kept doing that! 

"I suppose we will have to, but it's such a corporate chain, with so little soul. I much prefer the flavours you get in the independent roasting houses."

Isak quickly headed for the nearest cafe and took Isak to a seat whilst he queued to give the order. "Anything to eat?" He shouted over. Isak shook his head, then changed his mind. "Yeah, a cinnamon pastry. It'll hide the flavour of the substandard beverage."

It was Isak senior's turn to roll his eyes!

As they quietly sipped their coffee and munched their cakes, Isak desperately tried to make conversation.

"So, how is school?"

"Fine."

"How are your grades?"

"Fine."

"Are you playing sport?"

"Yeah, I like football, but in the winter it not so easy."

"How's did your football team do this year?"

"Fine."

This was getting ridiculous! Isak took a sip of his large latte. He always found it really awkward as it had no handles, like drinking from a bowl.

Slurp, "How's Sonja?"

Isak saw something hard and strange flash across Isak junior's face. Just for a moment.

"Fine." He said again, but his voice was loaded with subtext.

Isak left a silence, not sure what to say. He felt like there was something more going on, but he wasn't sure if Isak would want to talk to him about it. (Like father, like son he thought wryly.)

"Actually, Mama and Erik are talking about moving." Isak said almost cheerily. "Mama has got a job working with the NRC, the Norwegian Refugee Council, but it's based in Geneva. They're really excited at the move. It's a great opportunity for Mama." He finished carefully.

"But...?" Isak supplied.

Isak paused, and then whined out, "But, I don't want to go."

"Ah!" Isak breathed. "May I ask why not?"

He shrugged.

"You don't have to tell me, but I'm a good listener." I think, he added in his head.

Isak junior shrugged again, but this time spoke. His voice was full of emotion.

"I guess it's just too much. I know things have to change sometimes, but everything will be different."

He went silent again.

"And I wouldn't see my Papa. I'd really miss him. But if I don't go then I won't see Mama, and I'd really miss her!"

"I can understand that." Isak smiled. He let the silence settle for a bit as he thought. "Is there a reason Sonja hasn't told Even yet?"

"She told me about it a few weeks ago, but it was only confirmed this morning. With Papa not being well, I think she...you know...wanted to wait."

"Ah. OK. I think you should check with her and then I think you should speak to your Papa about this. He's feeling a lot better, but when it comes to you, he would rather know the truth, no matter what. And I know he would miss you too. I think it might help you to talk to him."

They both took a sip of their drinks and continued eating their pastries.

"Why don't you call Sonja and ask her and then come back home with me?"

He nodded. They finished their drinks and cakes.

Isak junior spoke up so suddenly it made Isak jump, "I think I know the perfect ring for Papa. Should we go and look at it now that we're finished?"

Isak nodded, "Yes please, I'm freaking out a little. I've managed to get a cancellation at the actual City Hall for the third Wednesday in January, and I'd like to at least get the ring sorted. The paperwork is all filed. I have an idea what to wear but I'm not sure if it's too much. You want to help me with that too?"

Isak actually smiled for the first time on their trip. "No way! I don't do fashion. OK, I saw an ace ring ages ago that I thought would be perfect. It's whisky barrel wood on the inside and polished granite on the outside and it's made in your part of the UK. It's in a little craft shop but we'll need to walk for a bit."

"Lovely. Let's go."


	13. Chapter 13

When Isak returned to the apartment, with Isak junior in tow, Even was sitting in the living room reading a book. Although he was still working through his 'low' and getting plenty of rest, he was now back to work, doing better.

"Hey guys, Isak...what a surprise. How was your trip?"

"Really good, actually. We ordered a ring that we both love and think you'll love it too. Isak saw it ages ago he says, and it'll be here next week." Isak bent over and gave even a simple kiss. "I'm just going to go and put some laundry on. I'll leave you two alone." He nodded encouragingly at Isak as he left. Not subtle but necessary! 

When he returned with his empty bag five minutes later, he could hear Even shouting through the front door. 

"What the actual fuck, Isak. She can't do that. Get your stuff. We're going to see her."

Isak walked in quickly, trying to radiate an aura of calm. He spoke as gently as he could, "Hey baby. Are you sure that's wise, do you want to take a bit of time first? You don't want to be too over emotional. You need to have a conversation."

"Over emotional, of course I'm over emotional. She's making plans to take my son out of the country for good and she hasn't even spoken to me about it! Well, she will now!"

And off Even stormed, with both Isaks floating behind him like attendants to the King. Isak whispered to Isak junior to text his Mama to let her know they were on the way, that Even knew and that he was somewhat upset.

Luckily the train journey took long enough for Even to deal with his original anger, so by the time they reached Sonja's door he was less angry, but overall just more emotional. He kept mumbling, 'Isak can't leave, why would she take him?' Under his breath. Isak could hear the broken emotion in his voice as he spoke, and he wasn't sure that it was actually an improvement on raw anger. Even was still delicate after his depression, and Isak began to get really worried.

Isak junior opened the front door, and took them inside. Sonja was waiting for them. She walked them to the kitchen. 

"Hi Even. Isak. Please sit down. Something to drink?" Her voice was brittle and nearly as full of emotion as Even's.

Silence. No movement from Even.

Isak spoke, "Thank you Sonja. I'd like some water if that's ok?" 

Sonja waved at Isak junior and he went to get four glasses and a bottle from the fridge. Isak gently guided Even by putting his hand on his waist and they all sat down at the table.

Sonja spoke first. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you myself Even. I only got confirmation this morning and with you being ill, I didn't want to upset you unnecessarily." She poured the water as she spoke.

"Well that's convenient." Even spat out. "Don't tell the crazy guy, he can't handle the truth!" Isak gently took hold of Even's hand under the table and laced their fingers together. Even squeezed tight.

"That's not what I meant. I've never done that and you know it. It's just...well...if you must know it's hard. I wasn't certain I had got the job, but I really want it. It is the kind of role that can make a difference to a lot of people. But, I've seen Isak become more and more withdrawn over the past two weeks and I know it's because he is anxious about leaving. And he is always my priority, you know that. That IS why you've been so grumpy lately, isn't it Isak?"

Isak nodded silently.

"It is very difficult to see your child so upset, and to realise that you are the cause of it." She paused, tracing a pattern on the condensation on the side of her glass. "I've been speaking to Erik about it and I've slowly begun to realise that although I am not happy about it, Isak shouldn't come with us."

The young man's head snapped up and looked at his mother. "What?"

She turned to look at him, "I don't think it's fair to take you somewhere that you don't want to go. If we had no other choice it would be a different matter, but there IS another option." At this she smiled at Even. "You could go and live with your Papa...and Isak."

At this Even's head snapped up, first looking at Sonja, then his son and finally his fiancé. Isak senior took a sip of his water to cover his surprise and waited for Even to speak. The silence stretched.

"You know I would love Isak to live with me, but I don't think it is that simple. There are at least two other people to take into consideration. Isak?" He looked at his son.

"Of course I want to live with you Papa. I love our time together." He spoke honestly, "But I don't know how I feel about Mama living hundreds of kilometres away. I wouldn't be able to see her every day and I'd...miss her." He finished simply.

"I know, I'll miss you too Isak, so much. I would come home regularly, and you can visit during the school holidays. We can Skype and talk and message and even write if you want! And I'm sure there'll be good points that we haven't even thought about yet. And, honestly, if it isn't working out, I will come back. You are still my number one."

Isak junior and Even both nodded. Even turned to Isak, "And what about you babe? We are just about to get married, so this affects you just as much."

Isak could see all three of them looking at him. He hadn't expected this. He had been preparing to console a heartbroken Even at the loss of his son from his day to day life, not give his own options on a totally different scenario.

His head was full of thoughts: he loved Even more than anything, he loved Isak, he was a great kid (mostly) and he was a big part of his life already. But for him to live with them? To be a full time step parent? He fucked up a simple shopping trip today, how was he meant to cope with all the teenage shit that was about to explode? And what about Even's health? He was only just learning how to support Even with that...How could he do that with Isak there too. And what about sex? He really liked noisy sex! - then he looked up. How long was it since he had spoken? Was everyone still looking at him?

All of a sudden he was struggling to breathe, and the familiar taste of metal his mouth as it flooded with saliva. He felt like he was going to be sick. And then he blacked out.

He came to on Sonja's kitchen floor, a cold cloth on his head and Even's face hovering anxiously above his. Even's blue, blue eyes were crinkled in worry.

"Hey baby. I think you had a panic attack. I've never seen one that bad. I'm so sorry for putting you on the spot like that."

Isak was mortified. He felt embarrassed and totally ridiculous. Oh god, how would he explain to Isak that it wasn't because he didn't want him, but that it was just fear. Fear of his own inadequacies and how to parent Isak. Isak would think he didn't want him. They would all hate him. He felt his breath start to get laboured again, but before it could go any further, Even's hands were on his cheeks. 

"It's ok. Isak. Isak. Just look at me. That's right. Just me. It's ok. We're OK. Isak's ok. He's just worried about you. Look at me. Breathe with me. That's right. Slowly. Slowly. In. Out. In. Out. Do you want to count backwards from fifty?"

Isak nodded. So they stayed there and counted together.

Eventually Isak felt strong enough to sit up. There was a knock at the door, and Isak popped his head round.

"How's Isak."

"He's fine. It's a panic attack. He gets them sometimes."

"Is it because he doesn't want me to live with you?"

Isak tried to stand up too quickly and suddenly felt dizzy. He lay back down. Isak needed to know that it wasn't that at all! He had to say something. God, he was useless.

Even spoke instead. "No. That's not what this is about. But Isak and I do need to go home and talk about this together first. I'll give you a call later and explain. Please don't worry. It's been quite a day! Could you order us a taxi? I don't really feel like the train just now." He passed over his phone.

Isak used the app on Even's phone to order a car for them. The goodbyes were awkward, and Isak knew it was his fault. 

The taxi was an expensive luxury, but it was worth it when within half an hour they were sitting on their own bed with two of Even's special hot chocolates - for the sugar - their slouchy clothes on and limbs all tangled together.

"Ok baby, I think we need to talk."


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Communication

"Well, aren't we both just a fucking mess!" Even laughed. Isak smiled back at him. They both put down their empty mugs and looked at each other.

"I don't know what to say, Even. I'm so sorry for freaking out like that."

Even shook his head. "No apologies. Neither of us has been very great at being totally honest, especially with our feelings."

Isak thought for a minute. "Ok. So how about we each take turns to speak. The other can't interrupt except to ask questions of clarification. We'll just keep going until there is nothing left to say."

"But what if it's hurtful." Even wondered.

"Then we'll deal with it. I can't lose you. We need this sorted!"

"OK, I suppose that could work, but I'm still a bit nervous. Can we promise to kiss regularly? That always makes everything better."

Isak smiled. "I will never refuse your lips." He gave him a kiss. "See?"

Even quirked his mouth. "Will I go first? Here goes..."

Isak nodded.

"OK. I'm sorry about not telling you that I could feel myself slumping. I should have told you, but I was just so scared that you were going to leave. I can see now that I was way off. I should also have discussed my bipolar with you and talked about triggers or signs."

"But Even..." Isak began. 

"No interrupting baby!" Even smiled. Isak nodded sheepishly.

"However, I think you need to also think about how much you let me take care of you without considering me...I'm sorry, this is really hard to say...You were very focused on your own situation and maybe were a little selfish? Your explanation for why you didn't buy me a ring seems to be self indulgent to me - not feeling like you deserved me. You didn't consider how 'out there' I felt, committed to you but nothing from you to show me that you felt the same." Even sighed, then smiled softly, "And yet, every time we made love, I could feel how much you cared for me, so I know that some of it was just my poor perception of the actual stuff that was going on. That happens when I'm really down, full on pessimist! Not so much glass half empty, as glass smashed on the floor with water splattered everywhere."

Isak nodded at Even's attempt to lighten the mood but he could feel his eyes filling, and he desperately didn't want to cry.

Even caught the glint of tears in Isak's eyes, "I'm sorry. Honestly, I don't mean to hurt you. I just want us to get better at being together and this is how I feel." Even stopped, looking anxiously at Isak. "Can you please say something..."

"I agree." Isak began, nodding and sighing, "I was very selfish letting you take care of me. I think it was an easy pattern to fall into. But really, it is so fucking hard to totally start over. Everything new. Your life is here, your job, friends, family...but I only had you. And I also think that you were a little selfish too. You are the expert in Bipolar, and you kind of left me to flounder, without really explaining things. I don't think that was fair." Isak breathed out nervously.

"I agree with you." Even stated plainly. They looked at each day other. "Can I kiss you now to say sorry?"

"Only if I can do the same?"

They kissed, closed mouth, tender and vulnerable. A little shaky but full of feeling. They hugged and let the moment settle.

"Ok, first bit done. What's next?" Isak asked, mumbling into Evens neck.

"Your anxiety attack." Even pulled back and stroked Isak's face. "What's going on baby? Is it about Isak? If you don't want him here you'll have to be honest. I love you very much, but Isak is my first priority, and if he needs me, I will have to be here for him. I couldn't do anything else. In getting me...you kind of get him too!" 

Isak nodded. "I know that. It's not how it seemed. I didn't freak at Isak living here. Erm... I didn't say anything earlier because he needed to speak to you about Sonja. Our shopping trip today, for nearly 90% of the time was an awful experience for me. It was a disaster! He was really grumpy to the point of being rude. And really arrogant, a bit of an arsehole actually. I know now that it was probably linked to his worries about moving, but at the time I was struggling so much. So when I thought about him living here, just as he starts being a teenager...I don't know. I got scared about being the wicked stepfather I suppose!"

"Was he really that bad?" Even questioned.

"Even, it was awful!" Isak almost whined. "And then I just thought that we could never have sex in the kitchen again. And you know how much I like that!"

Even sniggered a bit. "Ok, so what do you think now?"

Isak sighed and weighed his words carefully. "If Isak wants to live here, he should. This is his home. But I think we should be prepared for the fuck-ton of teenage shit that is about to hit the fan. I have a feeling that midnight feeds and teething will be nothing compared to the angst that is about to descend."

"You want him here?"

"Of course I do, but I think we'll need to set some ground rules...for all of us actually. And actually...maybe a talk like this once a month or something, like a family meeting, to like, clear the air. We're going to be a strange collection!"

"I'll phone Isak and Sonja, maybe Skype them as soon as we're done here...because first I'm going to kiss you again!" This time, a little more tongue was involved. Isak reluctantly pulled himself away.

"What's next?"

"Erm...the wedding? You promised to keep me in the loop, but you haven't told me anything and it's making me anxious. You promised it would be small. I'm really not ready for anything else yet."

"OK, that's an easy one. I've booked Oslo City Hall for the third Wednesday in January at 11am (it was a cancellation). I know it seems like a big place, but it's just in a room. And...because we both live in Oslo, it's free. We need at least two witnesses, so I've invited Isak, Sonja, Erik and lastly Sven, because I want to have at least one friend there. You are going to wear your suit jacket and nothing else (wee joke! You'll wear the full suit) and my outfit is a surprise. Afterwards we're going to a posh coffee roasters that Isak suggested for lunch. That's it!" Isak let out a breath.

Even looked at him. He was processing the information carefully, "That all sounds very simple. How are we getting there?"

"Tram."

"Who's paying for lunch?"

"We are."

"Will there be vows?"

"Do you want vows?"

"Yes."

"Then yes, there will be vows."

"Will there be speeches?"

"No."

"What are you wearing?"

"Aha...nice try. That's the only secret! Can I kiss you now?"

"You may kiss the bride." 

He did. For a long time.

"Phew..." Even fanned his face. "Down boy, we've still got more things to talk about. What's happening with your job?"

"You understand why I've resigned from the lab?"

"Yes baby. I understand how it made you feel. You know I want you to have a career that you love, same as me. I never pressured you into taking it."

"No. That was all me...Well, I've arranged a meeting with Arne, one of the guys from the sauna, for tomorrow. He works in research at UiO and he says there may be something I'm a potential match for."

"But I thought you had already checked out the pathology options, and they were no good?"

"He thinks he might have something that suits me. I have no idea what it is. Do you want to come with me?"

"No, I'm working, and I don't want to look like a clingy partner - even though I am a clingy partner! What could the job be?"

"I've no idea. I've done lots of reading online about all their research. UiO are an amazing operation, really cutting edge and very well funded in comparison to other places. They do loads of interdisciplinary studies, and links with other universities, so maybe it's one of those. I'll know tomorrow."

Even smiled, "Well lastly is skiing."

"Skiing?"

"Yes. And swimming, and running, and saunas. I really think that you should keep doing it all. You really enjoy it, you suit being outside, it seems to make you happy. You're making friends and you're also getting pretty toned, which I benefit from too!" He smiled cheekily.

"Then yes. I'll keep doing it." Isak returned his smile with a broad, sparkling, beaming, grin that lit up the room. 

Then I think that's everything. Do you have anything else?" Even smiled back.

"Nope...except..."

"Except..."

"Christmas!" Isak stated. "It's only a few weeks away and we don't have any plans."

Even looked thoughtful. "Well, Isak usually spends Christmas Eve with me and the day itself with his mum, unless I'm working and then we rearrange to suit. I have a tree, cook 'Ribbe' which is roast pork belly with boiled potatoes, sausages, prunes and pickled cabbage. Isak helps me bake almond cookies and we eat until we're full. We play FIFA and listen to cheesy music. Does that sound like something you could join in with?"

"Could I add a few traditions of my own, like maybe crackers and trifle for pudding?"

"Sounds great, I'll check dates with Sonja." Then tentatively, "Also, I was thinking, and you could say no if you wanted to, what do you think about us having a party, maybe the 26th or 27th? Make us a bit more social. What do you think?"

"Will you be up for that by then?" Isak asked as sensitively as he could.

"Yes. It'll be good. We won't go crazy, (sorry) I mean over the top, a few friends, some food and music. Perhaps a party game or two?"

Isak groaned, "I hate party games."

"And I love them!"

"So, I suppose I'll leave that to you!"

"Ok, is there anything else?"

"There is one more thing." Isak asked shyly

"What baby?" Even looked concerned.

"Well, do you think that we could practice more of the kissing. I feel like we haven't quite got that right yet." Isak wiggled his eyebrows in a poor imitation of Even.

"As you said earlier, "I will never refuse your lips."

So he didn't.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Job offer

Isak surprised himself how much he enjoyed just walking round the UiO campus. As usual, he had arrived by train far too early for his meeting, so decided to pass the time by having a wander. Some students had obviously finished for the Christmas break, but there were still plenty of people working and walking around, mostly in casual clothes, but a few in suits.

There was a feeling to a university campus that he had forgotten about. The pleasure of learning and the knowledge that everyone else around you valued that too. Like a shared secret. Campuses were such multi cultural, eclectic places, full of people from all over the world and with a huge variety of interests and passions. He loved that feeling of potential. He walked slowly, reading the posters for meetings, rallies and club nights and smiled at the passion of these young people. They seemed to really care and stood up for that said passion, whether it was politics or parties.

He found the building where he was meeting Arne, and was only fifteen minutes early, so he decided just to go in. It was a large tower block, it looked like a sixties construction, with a modern foyer and reception area. It was pretty brutal, but he like the simplicity of these buildings, they were just a place to work in, a place to learn. The man behind reception asked if he could help him - in Norwegian, so Isak answered as best he could, giving Arne's full name. The man switched to English immediately. Obviously his Norwegian still needed some work!

"I'll just let Professor Bredahl know that you're here. Please take a seat."

Isak wandered over to the seating area, but remained standing, looking at the abstract art on the walls and a rather obscure bronze sculpture, which looked like a bacteriophage when magnified. He didn't think it could be that. He bent over to read the plaque: Bacteriophage, modelled in bronze. He raised his eyebrows...well, there you go!

"Isak, so glad you could come." Arne was striding towards him, hand outstretched. "I see you've noticed our bacteriophage. We call him Bjorn." He let out a short laugh. "Follow me."

They began to walk across the entrance hall.

"You found us ok?"

"Yes thanks, I arrived a bit early, so I've had a look around. It's a lovely university."

"It is a nice campus, but it's also a great place to work. The administration seem to really value you what we do and it's good to have the research appreciated. Would you like a more formal tour?"

"Would you mind if we didn't, I'm actually really keen to hear what you think I might be able to work on?"

"Ok, let's head to my office, but we can chat on the way. Lift or stairs?"

"How many floors?"

"Seven..."

"Then lift I think." Isak smiled.

Arne pressed a button on the panel for the lift and began to speak, "So Isak, I'm in charge of a group of research projects all linked to climate change. We're working with UiT, that's the Arctic University of Norway, which has a few different campuses, but I'm linked with Tromsø."

"That's in the Arctic Circle?"

Arne nodded. "We have got four projects ready to start and we've got access to sponsorship to the tune of 120 million kr. which we had to bid into. There will be many people working on it from all over the world."

"It sounds vast!" Isak exclaimed. The lift came to a halt and Isak followed Arne along a corridor.

"Yeah, it is, but also really exciting. Our main focus is the indigenous peoples. What are their opportunities and challenges due to climate change? How will it effect public health, preventing and curing disease and improving living conditions? There are also options to look at sustainable resource management and development. In the long run it will affect us all." 

He stopped outside a plain looking door. "This is me, please come in."

The office was nothing special, and a bit on the small side, but Isak sat on the chair that was probably reserved for students. Arne offered him a coffee.

"No, I'm fine thanks." He waved his hands a bit, "It sounds amazing, and I'm very flattered, but I don't see where I would fit in? It doesn't seem to be linked to pathology at all."

It's not really but what it IS linked to is a serious amount of high quality lab work. We will be taking samples of flora, fauna, water, ice, rock etcetera even samples from the people, and it all must be permissioned, catalogued, referenced, checked and stored properly. We'll need a strong team of lab staff, so that any of the projects can access the samples when they need to. And it all has to be done with as little environmental impact as possible. We'll be accessing sites on skis and foot where possible, avoiding snowmobiles and the like. The lab will be mobile so that it can also carry out basic analysis on site or perhaps the local campuses and store the data in such a way as it can be cross matched for any of the factors."

"And you think I could work in this team?" Isak couldn't keep the excitement out of his voice.

"Totally. There will be opportunities for promotion as the projects develop and splinter into different areas, but to start with it will be a unified team."

"It sounds amazing. Can I ask why you thought of me?"

"Hearing about your life when we were chatting made me realise how brave you have been in moving to Oslo and starting again. You also seemed ready for a challenge - you didn't speak well of the lab you were in. Sven loved your positive attitude and skills when you were learning to ski, so that's an important factor. Also, I like you and I think you would be a strong team player. You make friends easily and that's important in such a large, mixed group. I think you would be an excellent addition."

Isak laughed, "You think I make friends easily?"

"You're here aren't you?"

Isak was gobsmacked. He was unsure what to say next. Arne seemed to have seen qualities in Isak that he hadn't noticed in himself. 

"If I was successful, and got the job, what would be involved?"

"Well, we would spend the first twelve months in the north, with Tromsø as our base, but also using the other campuses and more remote sites, collecting samples. It would start in March and go through to the following January or February. It means we will catch both summer and winter conditions. We have to give it nearly the full twelve months for complete sampling."

Isak stilled. "I would have to move to Tromsø?"

"Yes, from March, at least for that first year. Then depending on which project you are assigned to you could come back to UiO or continue on at UiT. But we would start the preparations here as soon as the team is sorted, so you'd start work in late January."

"Oh." Isak felt the wind being knocked out of his sails. "What about Even?"

"Well, there is provision for a partner and/or families to relocate if necessary. What does Even do?"

"He works on reception in a hotel."

"Surely he could transfer or something? Tromsø is a busy, vibrant place. It's really amazing."

Isak nodded but his enthusiasm was draining quickly and was turning into disappointment.

"Anyway. I can see you have a lot to think about. If you give me your email address, I'll send you the full details in writing and a link to the application form. Applications close on the 24th December. I can look it over if you like, but as a member of the recruitment panel I can tell you that I am keen for you to join us."

"Thank you Arne. You've been very generous with your time, and very kind in your comments." Isak breathed in, "Can I ask you one more thing?"

"Certainly."

"Could you keep this quiet just now, not tell Sven or anyone, until I've had a chance to talk to Even."

"Of course."

\----

The train ride home was a very unpleasant one. Isak was lost in thought. His first instinct was to just forget about it all. Tell Even that Arne offered a project that didn't interest him or that he was not skilled for. That way they could just continue with their plans for Christmas, the party and the wedding. After all, Even and Sonja had just agreed on Isak juniors's moving date at the end of January and already Isak junior was looking more settled, less grumpy, more like his old self. If he now returned home and told Even about this it would set a bomb off in the middle of their lives, and neither he nor Even needed that level of stress. 

However, he had promised to be truthful with Even from now on. If he kept this from him it would likely just explode at a later date. Secrets never seemed to stay secret in Isak's life. And they had been communicating so well!

To tell or not to tell. Either seemed a pretty risky move.

And then he thought of the project. It sounded amazing. He had never thought an opportunity like this would ever come his way. All the past few months seemed to point towards this as a perfect next step. And he really, really wanted to do it.

As the train pulled in to the station and he began the walk home, he still had no idea as to what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been very excited to get to this point where the story takes a wee turn. I hope you like where it goes now.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life.

Isak walked though the front door without having made up his mind what to do. Even was waiting for him, cooking dinner which smelled great. He was in full cooking mode and looked just stunning: sleeves rolled up, tomato splatters on his shirt and flour dusting his hands. Isak walked over and gave him a quick kiss. And then a longer second one, and then a more passionate third. He pushed Even's hips with his hands and manoeuvred him backwards, until he was pressed against the kitchen counter. Isak felt his blood heat up. Before he knew it he was kneeling in front of Even, tying to pull down his zip. 

"Wow, Isak, kitchens really DO do it for you after all." Even panted, holding his floury hands up, like a doctor, trying to avoid contamination.

Suddenly, Isak sat back on his haunches and looked up at Even. What was he doing? This wasn't as a result of love or passion, or even lust, but the bubbling to the surface of his fear. His face must have shown the turmoil in his heart and head because Even instantly knelt in front of him, distractedly wiped the flour off his fingers and onto his jeans so he could hold Isak's cheeks in his hands.

"Hey. What's wrong? You look...what is it?"

"It was the meeting..."

"Did something bad happen to you?" Isak could hear the worry in Even's tone.

"No, nothing like that. I'm sorry about the kitchen and the..." He pointed at Even's crotch. "I am just feeling a bit... I don't know what came over me."

"It's ok baby." Even stroked his hair and temples. "You can tell me."

"I want to, I just...I really need to talk to you, but my brain is a fucking mess."

"Come on," Even stood up, pulling Isak with him. "Let's go somewhere more comfortable than the kitchen floor."

Once they were seated face to face on the sofa, Even picked up Isak's hand and laced their fingers together. "What is it? You can tell me anything..."

"I know, but this is huge. It's going to start something that...well..." He sighed, "I just don't know what to do." 

Even gently kissed him on the lips and kept his nose touching Isak's, "Then just tell me, and we'll sort it together. Is it about the job offer?"

Isak nodded. Even face became tender. "Then just tell me." He sat back and waited.

"Well, as I told you, I met with Arne. The project, projects really, are massive and involve a big lab team that he wants me to work on. The topics are really interesting and the work will be the challenge I have been looking for. It will involve a lot of outdoor working, which is unusual for lab staff, but a really attractive part of the job. Also, there will be potential for promotion as things develop."

"But that sounds amazing. Why do you sound so stressed?"

"Although I would start at UiO at the end of January, the project moves in March to UiT and the surrounding area to begin sampling...for a year." A lengthy pause. "If I want this job I'll have to move to Tromsø for at least a year."

"Even dropped Isak's hand and sat back. "Oh." He said weakly.

"There is support to relocate families." Isak continued, his voice flat and monotone, "...if they want to come."

"Oh." Even repeated.

There was a heavy silence. Both men seemingly scared to speak. They made eye contact, Isak spoke first.

"I thought about not telling you. Just saying the job offer was no good. If I just ignore it then we can celebrate Christmas, the wedding and Isak moving in and just get on with our lives. But I couldn't. I know the timing is awful, but this is like my dream job. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity. And we promised honesty."

Even nodded.

The silence returned. Isak was desperately trying to read the emotions on Even's face. He looked like Isak felt.

"I don't know what to say."

"I know, neither do I."

"Right," Even began, feeling his way with the words as he spoke, "let's try to break it right down to basics. A - you've been offered your dream job but it involves moving to Tromsø for a year. B - you want to marry me and take me with you. C - my son is coming to live with us because he didn't want to leave Oslo with his mother, so he would have to come to Tromsø as well."

Isak nodded his head. Even continued.

"This leaves us with two options: firstly, all three of us agree to move to Tromsø or secondly you don't apply for the job and we all stay here."

Isak nodded again.

"Isak, I can't ask Isak junior to move a thousand kilometres away and leave everything he knows behind, when he's coming to live with me to avoid that very thing."

"I know," Isak muttered, eyes down.

"And I won't ask you to give up this opportunity. It's everything you could wish for in a job."

"I know." Isak repeated.

For the millionth time, a silence descended like a freezing mist, Isak could almost feel himself shiver.

"I guess that only leaves one option then..."

"Yeah, I suppose it does." He breathed in, "Thirdly..." Isak continued, sounding decidedly wretched, "I go alone and we have a long distance marriage for the first year."

Even stood up, walked to the hall, put his boots, hat, scarf and coat on, opened the door and quietly left. Isak felt his eyes fill and the tears spill over onto his cheek. 

"Fuck." He breathed out.


	17. Chapter 17

It was there...all the time. In the background. Niggling at his comfort. Like the whine of a mosquito. Unknown but inescapable.

The Christmas season had been a strange time. 

Isak and Even had visited the Christmas market, walking around all wrapped up, holding hands, laughing at the cheesy decorations but enjoying the feeling of goodwill that permeated the place, even though it was rather artificial. They drank gløgg and Even insisted on buying Isak every type of thermal clothing he could find, hats, gloves and especially red long-johns. It would keep him warm in the cold north, he said. Isak had worn them, and then removed them, for Even that same night.

Isak sent in his application form for the job.

Even's ring arrived and they decided that Isak should take his off so that they could put the rings on each other's fingers during the wedding ceremony. Together.

Christmas Eve with Isak junior was good fun. Even's food tasted delicious and the awful cracker jokes were a hit with both Bech Naesheim men. When it came to the time for gifts, Isak loved his present from his Papa and Isak of new football boots, and he bought the two of them a lovely photo frame that would eventually hold their wedding picture. Isak and Even decided to wait until Isak had gone back to Sonja's to exchange their gifts. Even had bought Isak an old fashioned letter writing set and fountain pen. He explained that if they were going to be separated then he at least expected weekly love letters like all the protagonists in the best love stories. Isak had bought Even a return plane ticket for two from Oslo to Tromsø, to be used at a date of his choosing. 

Even had worked on Christmas day.

They had decided against hosting a Christmas party, instead spending the time between Christmas and New Year when Even wasn't working, together, mostly home alone or with Isak junior, just enjoying each other in every way possible. 

On the 28th December Isak received an email asking him to come for an interview on the 5th January. Even helped him prepare, researching relevant information for him and asking him mock interview questions. Isak was offered the job immediately, accepted it and was given a starting date of 30th January. It was confirmed that they would leave for the north one month later on the 1st March.

It was all achingly normal. Two grown men, getting on with their lives.

But for Isak, underneath all of this there was a something, a white noise, like a whine just on the edge of your hearing. You stop noticing it but it's still there, making you uneasy and setting you on edge, giving you a headache that throbs continually in the background. You feel unsettled but you're never sure why. 

Always there. All the time. Underneath. Still niggling at his comfort. Unknown but inescapable.

He knew that they would soon be married: they were already together in every other way, emotionally, spiritually and physically, now they would be joined legally. And it was what he wanted. He wanted it so fucking much.

He glanced across the living room at Even who was ironing his shirt. Glorious Even, all pale skin and long limbs and kind, blue eyes.

"We're getting married tomorrow." He smiled at Even.

"We sure are!" Even smiled back

"Why didn't you get your shirt dry cleaned?"

"I just like to feel that I'm doing something myself, to show you how important this is to me." He focused as he pushed the iron into a corner of fabric. "Do you not need to do anything to your outfit? It is just hanging there in that suit bag." He pointed innocently in the general direction of the bedroom. 

"No, I've checked it, it's fine." They shared another smile. "You really haven't looked?"

"No, I promised not to. I want to be surprised at your gorgeousness! Not that I haven't been tempted..." Even laughed.

And there it was. The white noise in his mind. Unsettling. On edge. And he suddenly knew what it was. It was the manifestation of his decision, the choice he had made. Last time he had chosen to return to Even. This time he had chosen to leave. And it was eating away at him.

As he slipped under the covers next to his fiancé, he settled into his place in the crook of Even's neck and sighed.

"Can we talk?"

"Mm mm."

Isak sighed, "Am I making a mistake? Leaving? I mean marrying you and then leaving. I don't understand how something can feel so right and so wrong at the same time? Honestly, I'm exhausted having this in my mind the whole time. Any decision that I make is the wrong one...as well as the right one!"

Isak could almost hear Even's brain whirring, considering how to respond.

"I heard someone once say that no one makes right decisions, you just make a decision and then make it right."

"What?" Isak looked confused.

"Isak, a year ago I never imagined anything like this for myself. Yet here we are, so in love and ready to get married. But I know, from experience, as well as just from being alive, that no relationship is perfect. Some lovers are separated by society...like Romeo and Juliet." He booped Isak's nose. 

Isak rolled his eyes, "Is this just an excuse to mention tragic love stories?"

"No, but..well 'yes' as well. Some lovers are separated by war and conflict and live without each other for years. Maybe their other half is fighting or across a border. Some are kept apart by events so enormous that they can never be together again, like maybe refugees or something." 

Isak nodded seriously.

"Some have very little time together and illness or death tears them apart and one spends the rest of their life alone, always missing the other." 

Isak held on to Even more tightly. 

"None of these are us. I don't WANT to be separated from you, but life doesn't work like that. We are going to live in different parts of the same country for a little while, but then we will be together again. It could be so much worse. After tomorrow, we will be married and neither of us will ever be truly alone, even though we may be apart. As Isak would say when I tell him to tidy his room - 'hashtag first world problems'. We take this and we make it work because we can. This is our decision - it's not just on you - and we will live in such a way that not only will this be the right decision, it will be the best decision."

Isak was overwhelmed. He kissed him with a consuming tenderness. How did he always know the right thing to say?

"And you? You're OK? This isn't too much? You're paying attention to how you feel?"

Even sighed, "Yes sir. I had a good therapy session this week and we've decided to increase my appointments to every two weeks for the first few months after you go. I promise I will do my best to stay healthy."

"Thank you." Isak breathed into his mouth. "Thank you for taking care of yourself and for taking care of me. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for marrying me."

"Always." Even breathed back. "Every time and in every universe."

Isak let his hands play across Even's torso. He circled his left nipple with the tip of his finger.

"I'm going to miss this nipple." He whispered.

Even snorted, "Just that one? What about the other one?"

"Sure, I'll miss it too, but this one is my favourite."

"Don't say that, you might hurt its feelings..."

Isak sat up beside Even and looked at him. 

He had planned to be cute and go round the whole of Even's body telling him how much he would miss this birthmark, or that freckle. The glint in his eye, or the whorl of his ear. The length of his limbs or the touch of his fingertips. But Isak could feel a fire burn through him. His eyes had gone dark, and there was a heat in them that had been missing for the past few weeks, forcibly replaced by a cool melancholy. But there was no sign of any sadness anymore. 

Even saw Isak's lust and acknowledged it. He leaned into him. Face to face.

He whispered, low, almost just a rumble in his throat. "Baby? Do you want to fuck me?"

Isak nodded, looking at Even through his lashes.

"Then do you want me to fuck you?"

Isak nodded again. 

Even began moving, undressing them both with a certainty that was clear to Isak. And he spoke the whole time.

"Then we will fuck noisily and messily and passionately and tenderly and lovingly because tomorrow you will be my husband and I love you." And he laughed darkly as he pulled at Isak's underwear, "and as we walk down the aisle, I promise you that we will both feel the ache of it to remind us that this is not just a silly ceremony but something real, it might hurt but will always be worth it."

And as they kissed, and touched, and rubbed, and joined - the buzz, the white noise, in Isak stopped. He settled. Even was his and they were together. They had chosen each other.

\-----

There were nine people standing formally at the front of a rather large and ornate room in Oslo City Hall.

The two at the front had already stated that there was no 'lawful impediment' as to why they couldn't get married.

The five behind them had also agreed that they also knew of no reason why the two at the front couldn't get married.

All of them were smiling, and at least three of them had tears in their eyes.

The city official was standing at the front and turned to the man on his left:

"Even, if you would now please read your vow to Isak."

Even took a piece of paper from his back trouser pocket and unfolded it. He began to read, his voice wavering a little.

"Isaac, Isak, my Isak. You burst into my life eight months ago and I fell in love with you - I had no choice. We had a only a week together and then you had to leave. But you, you did have a choice. You chose to give up your whole life for me and come back. I cannot describe how much I admire your bravery and commitment in doing that. You are the best man I know. 

Therefore, Isak, I make this promise to you now: I promise to love you, to care for you and to protect you. I will be honest with you and be completely faithful to you. And as you head to the arctic circle to save the world (quick glance and smile), I will wait for you. Marriage is a commitment and a promise, and so this is my promise to you."

He folded the paper and put it back where it came from.

"Isak, if you would now please read your vow to Even."

Isak blinked furiously, looking at the paper in his hand. He wasn't sure he could get through this. He looked up at Even, who simply smiled gloriously at him and gave a little nod.

"Even, my Even, a year ago I was a mess. I was a divorced closet case who suffered from anxiety attacks. Then I came to Oslo on a whim and met you and you blew me away with your kindness, patience and of course your amazing ass. Oh and your blue eyes that I will never tire of looking into. 

And so I make you this promise: I promise that I will be fully committed to you and love you and show you my love...somehow...every day. I promise to care for you, look out for you and stay with you to the end of my life. And I want to say how much I admire you for understanding me enough to support me as I go to Tromsø. Although apart, we will be together. I love you very much."

The official invited them to exchange rings, declared them married and told them to kiss, before they both began crying so much that they wouldn't be able to.

And as they kissed, Isak felt Even hold onto his jaw, connecting with him, so he moved his hand onto the small of Even's back, trying to have the same effect. Even slid his cheek along Isak's and whispered to him. "How's your ass?"

Isak smiled, "aching...probably the same as yours." 

They pulled apart and Sonja, Erik, Isak junior, Sven and Arne (he had asked if he could come) started clapping. They were each given cuddles, kisses and handshakes, especially from the official who seemed especially delighted to have married them. They invited him for lunch, but he had to decline as he had another ceremony. Still it was nice that he was so happy for them.

As they wandered across a snowy Oslo to Isak junior's hipster Coffee House for lunch, Isak held tightly onto Even's hand. Even, as usual, had forgotten his gloves.

"Are you warm enough, Even?" Isak smiled goofily at his husband.

"Me? You're asking me?

"You forgot your gloves!"

"I know Isak, but I think hands are the least of the discussion points here. You're wearing a fucking Scottish kilt.. in Oslo...in the middle of winter. You've got bare knees! I can't believe you're wearing a KILT. I didn't even know that you were Scottish. How did you manage to keep this from me. It's a KILT!" And then he added, "Do you have any underwear on?"

Isak sniggered. "It's been hanging in the bedroom for two weeks. You could just have looked!"

"No, I couldn't have, you know that... What on earth made you decide on this for your wedding outfit?"

Isak smiled, "Ah Well, I was freaking out a little bit about what to wear. You look so hot in a suit that I didn't want to be compared to you on my wedding day. My mum's maiden name is McInnes, her family's Scottish so with a little bit of digging, my uncle sent this over for me. It kind of felt like a link to her. And I decided against the full formal jacket so I chose this Norwegian jumper instead. And it is lovely and toasty. It's a nice mix don't you think?" 

Even nodded at Isak's story. "You're quite a man!"

Isak flashed a rather dirty grin, "And no, I'm not wearing any underwear, it's actually surprisingly warm. Do you like it?"

"Isak." Even growled, "I adore it and I'll show you just how much later!"

The lunch was very relaxed and a lovely way to celebrate. Isak kept looking at their rings, amazed that they were now officially together. Isak junior chatted easily to Sven and Arne, and Even didn't stop smiling. 

Sonja and Erik surprised them at the end of lunch with their wedding gift: they were to spend their wedding night in a suite at the Radisson Blu, with dinner and breakfast thrown in. Isak was very touched and made sure to thank them most sincerely. 

And what a wedding night it was, especially when Even asked Isak NOT to take his kilt off, at least at first. Isak was pleased that his unusual choice of outfit was a hit. Maybe he'd ask his uncle if he could keep it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry/not sorry about the kilt.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to arindwell and their lovely story What I Have Is Right Here, for allowing me to use the idea that Isak loved the outdoor life and grows a beard.

February had flown past. Isak junior had moved in, Isak senior had started his new job and began his preparations both personally and professionally for the move to Tromsø. And through it all, Even had carefully looked after both the men in his life.

The three males had had their first house meeting during that first week. They had decided that each of them would get a chance to raise anything that they felt needed discussed and that the other two would get to respond in turn. This was to try and keep things in check, just in case.

Isak junior raised the issue of his bedroom. He wanted it to be a no-go area for the adults. Isak senior thought this was fair, but Even agreed only on the proviso that it was cleaned out and hoovered at least once a week. Isak junior seemed happy with that arrangement. (Isak senior wasn't holding his breath!)

Isak senior had brought up Even. Even did most of the cooking and general nurturing, so he felt the other two of them should do more of the tidying up and other household chores. That resulted in a LONG discussion on the sharing out of jobs. Bathroom cleaning especially. Everyone had an opinion. Eventually a compromise was reached that Isak felt supported Even enough and stopped him taking it all on himself.

Finally Even had raised the topic of sex. Both of the Isak's had blushed ferociously as Even explained how as newlyweds they would need their privacy so Isak junior had to be sensitive to this. He asked if Isak could arrange a sleepover for the night of Even's birthday the next week so that the couple could have some together time. His son agreed immediately and had refused to make eye contact for the rest of the evening. Even's request resulted in no discussion whatsoever as everyone was far too embarrassed. Fun times all round!

And then before they knew it February was over and March had arrived. Isak and the lab team had spent the previous month organising and shipping all their equipment north, including specialised clothing, so Isak only had to sort his personal stuff, which he managed to squeeze into one large suitcase and maximum size cabin bag.

Unlike the last time Isak left, he had demanded that Even come to the airport to see him off. This had turned out to be a mistake. Isak had forgotten that all the other members of the lab team were on the same flight and he had definitely underestimated how emotional both of them were going to be. Isak had stood kissing Even at the departures gate until the very last minute and had still then had run back for a final hug and numerous cheek kisses and nose rubs.

"You have to go now." Even sighed and peeled Isak from his chest. "I love you."

And Isak left.

He was now crying in a seriously embarrassing way in front of all of his new colleagues as he sat on the plane, he had a pounding headache and was dreading the next two hours.

Amir had been allocated the seat next to him and flopped down,

"God, you two are pretty intense! How long have you been together?"

"About nine months." Isak managed through his sniffles.

"Oh, I was sure it must have been decades." Amir snorted..."because of all the luuuuurve and angst!"

This led Isak to laugh out loud and proceed to tell Amir the full story, right from his solo holiday, to his coming out, arrival in Oslo and finally their wedding. And in return, Amir told Isak about his own life and loves, his mad extended family across the globe and his love of all things science. This meant that they talked constantly for the whole flight and by the time the plane touched down in Tromsø, Isak had a new friend. It helped.

As promised he had texted Even every day. He also wrote him a letter every week, using the fancy stationary Even had bought him at Christmas. He thought he would struggle with what to tell him, but there was always so much! And twice a week, they Skyped for about an hour, working round Even's shifts at the hotel.

"I can't believe how fucking healthy you look." Even whined at Isak. "You've only been there three months and you look amazing."

Isak scratched at his beard, the rasp of it sounding strangely loud to his ears as it came back to him over the laptop speakers, "You think so? I wasn't sure about the facial hair, but it makes everything so much easier, especially when we're out in the wilds!"

"I like the beard, I can't wait to feel it." He wiggled his his eyebrows. "It's grown in pretty red, I think you must have some Viking in you. But your face is so strong looking and defined now, and your eyes just sparkle. And your hair is like a blond cloud. Are you sure that you're not getting any on the side?"

"Baby, there isn't time, I work every hour I can, and the midnight sun seems to make people just keep going and going. And anyway, I share this tiny flat with Brede, so no privacy anyway! And a twenty six year old anthropologist (with questionable hygiene if I'm honest) is so not my type!"

Even smiled, "Well, its only two weeks 'til Isak's school finishes and he goes to visit Sonja. I can't believe he'll be going to Ungdomsskole after the holiday! He's so grown up."

"It's ok, you don't look old enough to have a son in middle school!"

"But the good news is, with Isak out of the country for two weeks, I'll soon be on my way to see you! Two weeks and I'm there. With you. For your birthday. I can't wait."

"Neither can I."

"What is Brede going to do for those two weeks?" Even wondered out loud.

"He's going to crash at Amir's (Amir offered, bless him) to allow us full 'conjugal rights'!" Isak laughed. "...and then I really will have some Viking in me. Hopefully more than once..."

Even laughed back, "I can make that happen... Amir's really nice isn't he? Wouldn't you rather share with him?"

"Absolutely, but I couldn't ask Brede to swap, he'd probably be really of offended!"

Even laughed and glanced at his watch, "Shit, I can't believe how quickly an hour passes, I'm going to have to go and pick up Isak from football training. It's weird having Sonja's car, but I think I like the freedom."

"So mature." Isak giggled.

"Ok, I gotta fly. Speak to you tomorrow. I love you." They both leaned in and kissed the centre of the screen, like they had done twice a week for the past twelve weeks.

Isak switched off his laptop and went to meet Amir for dinner. They had chosen a small fish restaurant that Isak had come to love, and as he waited for his friend, his thoughts drifted. 

God, he loved Tromsø. It was obviously scenic to the extreme, with its mountains and coastline. And the midnight sun, although usually behind clouds, was strangely intoxicating. Isak hadn't experienced the ubiquitous northern lights yet, and he was really looking forward to seeing them as a part of his day to day life. But Tromsø was also so much more: It's infrastructure was amazing, bridges, tunnels and roads all well maintained. The Arctic Cathedral was stunning and the houses were charming. The community was just that...a community. So much went on culturally and visitors were more than welcome to take part. As a university town, it was alive with precocious youth, and confident school children. Isak loved the museums and history. When he went out for a drink or coffee alone, people actually spoke to him, the opposite of Oslo! And more than all this, Isak absolutely, 100%, unavoidably, fucking loved his job.

It was a great team and the work was both satisfying and challenging. He had found skills in admin, lab work and outdoor research that he hadn't known he possessed. The Sami that he got to meet were fascinating and he hoped to work with them more. All this in only three months.

The only black mark against Tromsø, the only missing link, was his sublime Even, but Isak smiled to himself as Amir entered the restaurant - thirteen days, less than two weeks and Even would be in his arms again. Isak couldn't wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now I want to visit Tromsø.
> 
> Can I ask a favour? If there was one thing that would make my writing better, what would it be? 
> 
> I'm just learning.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A visit and some romance.

Isak was working when Even's plane arrived. He had in fact only managed to arrange for four full days off during Even's two weeks with him - the lab work just kept going despite Isak's desire to spend time with his husband. But he had his evenings off and as the sun never set, it would maybe feel like daytime. 

He had told Even to get a taxi to his building at the UiT campus and he would walk him back to the flat from there. The rental situation in Tromsø was pretty competitive so the team were mostly in tiny university rooms and apartment accommodation. Isak didn't care, it was close to campus and he loved the buzz of being in the university and the short walk every day. 

Isak had been on edge all morning, waiting for the phone call saying that Even was here. He knew that Even would be expecting a grand romantic reunion and Isak so wanted to give him that!

In fact he had plans to make the whole visit full of romantic gestures.

When Even's text came in, Isak grabbed the twelve blush pink roses he had ordered (NOT cheap but totally worth it), ran down the stairs and flew across reception. He could see the grin on Even's face from the other side of the foyer. He ran to him and flung himself into his arms, burying his head in Even's neck. Then he began pecking kisses all over his face, giggling and repeating over and over again, "I can't believe you're actually here! I've missed you...you're here...missed you...here...you."

"Wow," Even exclaimed, "That beard...I think I'm going to like it."

Once the energy of their reunion had settled a little, the two men just stood holding each other. Refamiliarising themselves and feeling so much emotion that they struggled to categorise it all. Isak pulled back and gave Even the flowers, "These are for you."

Even took them and smiled. Isak could see his eyes filling with tears. He felt the same, it was all so much. 

"I wanted to do something romantic for you, but I didn't mean to make you cry." Isak apologised.

"It's ok. I just hadn't realised how much I had missed you until I saw you and felt you in my arms again. I had forgotten your smell..."

They pulled tight together again. Even kept rubbing Isak's bristly jaw and in return Isak kept kissing Even's cheek.

"Take me to bed." Even eventually whispered. 

Isak smiled softly, took him by the hand and led him out the front door. They walked slowly but steadily, Isak pulling Even's suitcase behind him and Even carrying his roses like a prize. Their fingers were intertwined and Isak was surprised that he felt no need to rush as they crossed campus.

"I thought I would be all speed and passion, desperate to get you naked and be under you or have you under me, but I must admit, that just holding you and a walking with you is...I can't even describe it. I feel like, like, I'm whole again. God...what a cliché!"

Even smiled gently, "I feel exactly the same way. However, once I get you into the flat, I can assure you that you will be under me and you'll know for real just how much I've missed you."

Less than ten minutes later both men lay on Isak's bed out of breath and each of them had just had one of the fastest orgasms of their lives.

"God Isak, desperate much! I touched you only twice, maybe three times at most before you came."

"You're not really one to talk baby. I just licked you a few times and you exploded in my mouth."

"It's that beard. It does things to me!"

They both burst out laughing. It was clear that their bodies knew just how much they had missed each other. They cleaned up a bit and then just lay for the next hour, hugging, talking and touching each other. Isak couldn't stop looking at his husband. He was so pretty: beautiful eyes, sexy hair and those lips...

"So what do you have planned for my two weeks then, husband?" Even emphasised the final word, still stroking Isak's face. Isak smiled, Even obviously loved these bristles!

"I thought we could just do this every day. That ok?"

Even laughed. "Yes! But as you only have four days off, that might get a little boring for me when you're not here."

"Actually" Isak began to blush, "Actually, I really want to romance you. You have been so amazing and thoughtful, and I know how much you love cheesy crap, so I've got some plans to make some romantic memories for us. What do you think?"

"I think...yes. Never enough cheesy crap in the world! And could you be any cuter with all the blushing?" He kissed Isak's cheek. "I mean you don't need to be coy. I have literally just come in your mouth."

Isak blushed even redder.

"Ok." He stated seriously, trying to control the colour on his face. "Well! Tomorrow we are going a hike in the woods. It's not far, but I'd like to show you a place I've found that I like to go when I'm missing you. If you visit there with me then once you've gone I'll be able still to think of you when I go."

"That's pretty romantic." Even sighed.

"Apart from that, I've got a few plans like a romantic meal and a romantic midnight walk, and a romantic concert that we can get dressed up for. Also, maybe romantic clubbing?"

"Babe, are you just putting the word 'romantic' in front of everything there is to do here?"

"No! Maybe?" A shake of his head, "But...what about you? Is there anything you'd like to do, you're the tourist after all!"

"I'll do all the touristy stuff when you're at work - like the museums and cathedral, maybe a boat trip or a tour... The rest of the time, I intend to spend every minute with you. Easy!"

"I'm easy or the decision is easy?"

Even smiled, "Both?"

"Is that right?" Isak began to tickle him. They tumbled and rolled and giggled all over the bed. Even eventually got Isak to submit once he had straddled him, although he didn't doubt that Isak had let him win.

"I want to see the places you go to and meet your friends and see you at work, so that I can imagine you in all these places when I'm not here." He leaned down and kissed him softly.

"That's very sweet. We can do that." Isak lifted his head and kissed him back. "Are you recovered old man, because I believe I was promised that I would be under you and shown how much you missed me?"

Even showed him.

Isak took Even for the promised walk in the forest, to his favourite meadow. His husband was here at last and they were going to have sex. Hot, outdoor, could get caught but not caring one iota, sex. Isak was totally prepared. He had packed two blankets (one for the ground, one to cover them), a small picnic and the essential lube. He picked his spot and laid out the first blanket, he smiled at himself feeling very clever bringing the one with the the waterproof backing. He made Even sit down and passed him the tiny bottle of fizzy wine he had packed.

"Ok, more romance! Drink your 'romantic' fake champagne. I've got a 'romantic' poem for you that I'm going to read."

"You've written me a poem?" Even asked incredulously.

Isak snorted, "No you dork. It's by a real poet. Me...write a poem?" Even giggled too.

"Ok here goes. It's called Hour by Carol Ann Duffy. Please try to look suitably romanced when I finish! It's about making the most of the time we have together. And be kind, remember I'm a scientist not an actor. And it's in English so..."

"Get on with it!" Even interrupted.

"Ok! Ok!"

Isak cleared his throat dramatically, smiled bashfully at Even and began:

"Love’s time’s beggar, but even a single hour,  
bright as a dropped coin, makes love rich.  
We find an hour together, spend it not on flowers  
or wine, but the whole of the summer sky and a grass ditch." 

Isak swept his arm round, pointing to their location. Even nodded and smiled.

"For thousands of seconds we kiss; your hair  
like treasure on the ground; the Midas light  
turning your limbs to gold. Time slows, for here  
we are millionaires, backhanding the night  
so nothing dark will end our shining hour,  
no jewel hold a candle to the cuckoo spit  
hung from the blade of grass at your ear,  
no chandelier or spotlight see you better lit  
than here. Now. Time hates love, wants love poor,  
but love spins gold, gold, gold from straw."

He looked up. Even was staring at him. The silence stretched.

"Holy fuck Isak. That was stunning. Read it again."

Even laid back on the blanket and closed his eyes, arms behind his head. Isak did his best to caress his husband with the beautiful words. He had found the poem online and had recognised the feelings in it immediately. Even made the simplest of experiences meaningful for Isak and Isak wanted him to know.

When Isak had finished reading the second time. Even opened his eyes and pulled Isak towards him. 

"It's us!" He exclaimed, "We are gold from straw!" He sighed with satisfaction and tucked a stray curl behind Isak's ear, "Now please tell me that you have brought something useful like lube as well as these cute sandwiches and tiny bottles of wine, because I would very much like to get very dirty in the open air with you now."

Isak put the poem down and reached into the bag. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Even pick up the piece of paper with the poem on it, fold it carefully and put it safely in his zipped coat pocket. He smiled to himself.

He flourished the bottle of lube at Even like a trophy. 

It was Isak's first time having sex outside and he revelled in it. They were remote enough that the frisson of being caught was not particularly strong, but it still felt a little more dangerous. The fresh air and breeze were brilliant as they brushed over the bits of him that usually didn't see the outside world! And Even's skin in this cloudy but bright daylight was totally luminous. They didn't remove all their clothes, and Even on purpose kept his jumper on whilst naked on his bottom half, Isak loved this. 

His husband touched him firstly with tenderness and care, taking his time with all the parts of Isak that he hadn't seen in months: the tight skin on his ankles, the tickly softness behind his knees and the pale skin of his inside forearms. But as Isak became more aroused, Even's hands and mouth became firmer, more targeted and searching. He lay Isak down and Isak could feel himself being watched,

"Let yourself go, baby." Even whispered, his voice dripping with lust. "Show me how you feel."

As Even put his mouth on him, Isak's fingers clenched the blanket and his body struggled to hold still. He eventually clenched onto Even's bicep. He started biting his lip, but it wasn't enough. Even gave Isak his thumb, he had never done this before but Isak found it was intoxicating, although he had no idea why. He closed his eyes and licked, sucked and bit it and felt satisfaction. He realised his eyes had been closed to he let them open and saw Even looking back at him, face pink and breathing heavily.

"Fuck, Isak!" Even mumbled, "All this for me, you are so gorgeous, I can't get enough of you. I need more...be closer." Isak felt his heart swell in his chest.

Suddenly, Even's finger left Isak's mouth and he felt abandoned, his eyes searched Even's face and he groaned in disappointment, but Even whispered, "be patent baby..let me..." And suddenly the groans of disappointment became groans of satisfaction. Even targeted the heart of Isak's arousal and played with it until Isak could take no more. Even poured everything that he had into making love to Isak, and Isak felt it and desperately tried to return the depth of feeling. And when Isak reached his climax with Even deep inside reaching his own high, he shouted loud enough into the wilds to make a flock of birds take flight, "Holy fuck, ah Even, sex god, fucking love you". 

Even panted with satisfaction and knew that he had done a good job. So he threw his head back and shouted with a throaty guffaw, "Holy fuck, Isak, I fucking love you too."

They collapsed on each other, out of breath and sticky with sweat and other fluids, Isak pulled up the blanket and clung to Even.

Eventually they could speak again.

"I think my plan has backfired. I don't think I'll be able to visit here again."

"Aw, will it remind you of me and you'll miss me too much?"

"No, I'll instantly get a boner and a forty year old man alone in the woods with an erection is pretty creepy." He snorted, Even joining him giggling.

All of a sudden Isak held on more tightly to Even. "Fuck, I'm going to miss you when you go."

"Don't think like that, baby. We've got this whole holiday to make romantic memories." But he pulled him even closer under the blanket and clung back just as tightly.

Whilst Isak was at work during the day, Even went about completing the itinerary that he had set himself. He saw the sights and did a boat trip, as well as having a meeting that he had arranged a few weeks previously. It went very well. He also made a few phone calls that resulted in a second meeting. 

They two men met up with most of the lab team and Even got to know Arne a bit better but he especially liked Amir. The three of them had a particularly raucous night out for Isak's birthday that ended up with shots in a club and the worst hangover the men had felt for many years. Poor Isak had to work the next morning, so Even met Amir for breakfast as he had the morning off. Their conversation had been incredibly easy, first of all talking about how great Isak was, but then moving onto movies, music, books, art and travel. Even asked Amir's help with a little favour and Amir couldn't have been more happy to agree.

Even was having a brilliant visit, but before they knew it, it was their last day together. Isak had the whole day off and had his final romantic plans for Even.

"So baby, I thought today we would..."

"Stop!" Even shouted enthusiastically. "No more romance from you. Today is my day and I'll decide what we're doing. Come on, let's go." And he grabbed Isak by the hand and marched him out of the flat.

"Where are we going Even?" Isak asked, looking confused. Even looked quite excited and pleased with himself.

"It's a surprise, you're just going to have to be patient and wait and see!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Recommend Carol Ann Duffy's poetry. Sorry if it's a bit cheesy but Isak was struggling to find the words for himself.
> 
> What romantic surprise does Even have planned?


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very grateful for anyone who is still here. I can't do endings!

Even took Isak on such a massive walk round residential Tromsø, that Isak's legs began to ache, and Isak had skied up hills! Even kept pointing out interesting things he had learned on his tourist visits. Isak nodded politely, but then began to get concerned. They stopped outside a rather plain looking, tiny cottage.

"So what do you think?" Even raised his eyebrows.

"It's charming, babe, although I think it's the smallest house I've ever seen." His tone was definitely heading towards sarcastic. "Oh..is it famous?"

He was tired, hungry and frustrated that Even was wasting their last day together.

Even ignored the tone of voice and shook his head, "Let's go and ask if we can see inside?" he asked excitedly and pulled on Isak's arm. 

Isak stood firm and looked at Even carefully. "I'm just going to ask this out loud...ok? I'm sorry. Erm...Do you think you could be on the way to a manic episode. You are very...'high'!"

Even laughed, "I promise I'm not...just humour me and walk up the path...please?"

Isak squinted his eyes and followed him slowly. Even knocked on the door but there was no answer. He tried a second time. Nothing. He looked dramatically crestfallen.

"Oh well, never mind." Isak declared in the kind of patronising voice you use with toddlers, "they must be out. Can we now please go somewhere decent," he frowned at the neighbourhood, "and get some lunch...and a seat maybe?"

Even frowned at him and muttered something in Norwegian. 

"You know I can't understand you when you mumble." Isak grumped at him.

"I SAID", Even spoke pointedly, "Stop being such an arsehole."

Isak looked at him shocked, "I'M being an arsehole? Me? Even you've walked us across Tromsø, into a not very interesting residential area to see a small, unimpressive cottage which sits next to a...what is it...a factory?"

"I am TRYING to be romantic and surprise you, but again I say it...you are being an arsehole!"

"How is this a romantic surprise?" Isak all but shouted. "I was going to take us for a romantic lunch in one of the posh restaurants, don't you think that would have been much more 'romantic'?" He air quoted with his fingers round the last word.

Even slowly reached into his trousers pocket and with a flourish like a magician in Vegas, pulled out a set of keys with a large plastic tag. Silently but staring at Isak the whole time with a defiant look and raised eyebrows, he over emphasised taking the keys and fitting them in the lock, like a mime on the banks of the Seine. He faked a surprised face when they fitted and the door clicked open.

Isak watched him, at first angry, then puzzled and then ashamed as slow realisation crept up on him.

Even swung the door open and signalled to Isak to go in first. There was a tiny living room/kitchen with a table set as if for a romantic meal for two with cutlery, crockery, napkins, candles and flowers. There was a wine cooler with a bottle of something fizzy. Isak went over and looked at it.

"Even, this is real champagne!"

"I know. I brought it all the way from Oslo. I've arranged a romantic lunch for us, to say thank you for all you've done for me romance-wise this holiday. Amir came in this morning and set it up. You can be very annoying sometimes. I'm allowed to surprise you as well you know!"

"Oh Even. I'm so sorry for bring an arsehole." Isak walked over and hugged him. "This is a lovely surprise. I shouldn't have said anything..."

"No, you were right to ask." But added, "Just don't do that patronising voice next time. You get very self righteous when you're tired and grumpy."

Isak nodded. He looked around. "Where's lunch then? I'm starving. Is it in the fridge?"

Even set out lunch, and Isak ate enthusiastically. As they sipped the wine Isak asked. "Why this place baby? It's kinda out of the way."

"It was cheap!" Even shrugged. "It's half the price of an apartment nearer the centre of the city."

"To rent it for a lunch?"

"No...per month."

"But why does the monthly rent matter...?" Isak looked confused.

"Because I've taken out a lease until March."

"You've taken... Even. I know I've got a degree and I claim to be clever sometimes, but you're going to have to start at the actual start of this conversation for me please?"

Even put his knife and fork down and reached across the table to take Isak's hand. He looked him straight in the eye.

"Isak junior and I miss you. It's just not the same with you gone. We thought we would get used to it...but..." He shook his head. "So, we agreed that on this visit I would do a few things. He helped me plan it all, he is pretty amazing you know."

Isak nodded slowly.

"Firstly I went to visit the manager of the hotel on Storgata where I have arranged a transfer, he's a friend of my manager from years ago, and was happy to take me on as an experienced receptionist. We sorted out my shift pattern and contract."

Isak interrupted him. "You've got a job here?"

Even nodded proudly. "Secondly! I spoke to an estate agent that I have been in contact with for a few weeks. Laura! We came to view this place a few days ago and I signed the lease forms. You can add your names to them later."

"You've arranged for us to have a house, a home here?" Isak answered incredulously looking around. "How many bedrooms are there? And also, what about your son...Isak didn't want to move..."

"And thirdly," Even continued, ignoring Isak's questions, "I went to speak to the headteacher of the school that Isak will be going to, he looked it up online and really likes it. He has also looked at local football teams, but he says he might try hockey or skiing some more, like you. He'll start in August. He's going to come back from Geneva this week, then he and I will drive up in a van with all our stuff. It will take a few days but it will be our Bech Naesheim boys' road trip!"

Through this whole speech, Isak's mouth and eyes grew wider and wider, as if he was a cartoon character. He shook his head.

"What?"

"Isak...Isak junior and I are moving up here to be with you." he said slowly and carefully. "We both miss you too much and when we began looking into Tromsø, we realised we could give it a go. I have organised everything" he grinned proudly. 

"Baby! I can't believe you did all this? You always insist that you are terrible at organising things, but this is amazing. You've sorted everything."

Even beamed. "You really like it?"

"Abso-fucking-lutely." Isak beamed back.

They both stood up and walked round the table until they were hugging and then kissing. It lasted some time.

"Ok then...Now would you like to see round our new house? It actually won't take long because it really is very small. Things are expensive here!"

Isak tucked his forefingers into the waistband at the back of Even's trousers. He trailed behind Even the whole time with a massive grin on his face, and a feeling of fullness in his heart. 

"So this is the kitchen slash living space as you can see. Although small, it has excellent heating and a wood-burner in the corner for cosy winter nights. Laura says it is very well insulated and has no problems in the coldest of weathers. The family who let it out are apparently very reliable..." Even spoke like he was selling Isak the house.

Isak stayed behind Even and slid his arms around his waist. He kissed the space under his ear. Even leaned into it for a minute, then continued.

"These are the stairs, be careful, they're very narrow. This is Isak's room," he pointed, "this is the bathroom..." quick look. He paused, "and this is our room!" Even opened the door with a flourish.

Inside was a small room that managed to fit a double bed, a wardrobe and two small sets of drawers. It had no carpet, but didn't need one as there was minimal floor space anyway! The bed had a white cover on it and was scattered with red rose petals.

Isak gasped, "Oh my god Even. This is amazing...and totally cheesy." Then he paused. "Did you make Amir do this, the petals, I mean?"

Even nodded enthusiastically.

Isak groaned, "I am never going to live this down at work, am I?"

"Nope! Do you want to make a mess of it now? Have I done enough to deserve some fine love-making from my husband?"

Isak pushed his husband onto the bed with a bounce, scattering the petals all over the floor. He then straddled his hips and kissed him passionately.

"You are an amazing man and I love you. Don't let anyone ever tell you that you can't do things, especially yourself. Now lie there and let me give you something in return for all your hard work. I can't let you carry this marriage all by yourself."

Afterwards, as Isak lay twirling his fingers in the hair of a sated, sleeping Even, he realised that he had everything he could ever have wanted. He loved this house, he loved his job and mostly he loved his husband. At last they were together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that's it. Been a busy three weeks!
> 
> I hope you liked the boys in this universe. Thank you for everyone who read it and for those who left kudos or commented it is so appreciated.


	21. Epilogue - Family

"Isaaaaak! Hurry up or you'll be late." Even yelled up the stairs in their tiny house, spatula in hand, eggs beginning to overcook.

His husband was sitting at the table drinking a cup of tea and making a face at the noise, so early in the morning.

"Must you shout like that babe?" He groaned.

"Yup, it's in the dad handbook. 'Always yell at teenagers first thing in the morning'. I'm just fulfilling my role."

Isak smiled. Even always made him smile. "You're such an idiot!"

"Yes, but I'm YOUR idiot" he leaned over and kissed him tenderly.

Isak junior came thumping down the stairs, missed the last step and fell full force into the kitchen area, just managing to stay on his feet. Isak giggled, that's what the boy had done the very first time they met.

"It's not polite to laugh at other peoples mistakes, Isak!" The boy chastised seriously.

"I'm sorry." Isak straightened his face. "It just reminded me of the first time I met you. You did exactly the same thing. It's a happy memory."

"Did I?"

Isak took a sip of tea and nodded, "It's cute, just don't do yourself a damage..."

Isak flopped down at the table opposite him. He must face grown two full centimetres since Isak had left to come to Tromsø in March. He looked older and more like Even every day. It was now August, and he was ready for his first day at middle school.

"What were you doing anyway?" Even asked distractedly, stirring the eggs. He was doing that thing where he sounded like he didn't care what the answer was going to be to make the teenager more likely to answer the question. For some reason, the more it sounded like you cared, the less likely they were to tell the truth. Isak thought his husband was a genius psychologist of the first order!

"Gran and Grandad Skyped to wish me luck for my first day at school. I feel a bit sorry for them stuck in Oslo with mum and Erik in Geneva and us up here." He looked at his papa.

"Isak, I've already told them that they are more than welcome to visit."

Isak junior looked skeptical.

"I did. I even offered them a good deal at the hotel. They may be my ex in-laws, but they are still you're grandparents. They're your only grandparents! And despite the fact that they are delighted that your mum found someone much better than me, I actually quite like them. At least they're honest!"

Isak senior smirked behind his tea.

Isak junior continued, "I think they just feel a bit awkward."

"Why on earth would they feel awkward? Your mum and I have been apart for ten years. What could possibly..."

Even stopped suddenly and the silence became obvious. He pointed the spatula, "Did they say something about Isak? Because if they're homophobic or whatever, I'll not..."

"No Papa, not directly. I think if Isak was a woman they would probably feel weird too."

"Well I'm not wearing a dress for them." Isak senior laughed, "This isn't La Cage aux Folles!"

"And your legs look terrible in a dress anyway, and the beard might be a bit distracting!" Even snorted.

"I am what I am." Isak laughed back. Even kissed him quickly, just a peck on the lips.

Isak junior rolled his eyes dramatically. "Anyway, they're not my only grandparents."

Even and Isak looked at him, a little confused. "What do you mean?"

"Well, Isak's mum is still alive isn't she? She's technically my Grandma now."

Isak and Even made eye contact. Even's look seemed to say, do you want me to take this one babe? Isak just looked blank. This was totally unexpected. But before either of them could speak, Isak junior continued.

"I mean, I know she wasn't at the wedding so you might not be that close, but there's no reason you couldn't invite her here and I could get to know her. Is there?"

Isak opened his mouth to explain, but nothing came out.

"Ok junior, time for school. Let's get you going. Don't want to be late on your first day." And in full hustle mode, Even managed to get Isak to finish his breakfast, pick up his lunch and bag, kiss his papa, and be out the door before he could work out that Isak hadn't answered his question yet.

He came back in and sat down next to his husband. He kissed his cheek. "You ok?"

"Sort of." I'd better go too.

And in a quieter but uncanny repeat of Isak junior's exit, Isak senior picked up his lunch and bag, quickly kissed Even goodbye and was out the door, on his way to work.

Well that was a can of worms he hadn't expected to be taken out of the cupboard. Did he dare open it? How on earth was he going to answer that question?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I was out a long run and my head did this....


End file.
